so, i've been on this journey of figuring out who i am, and it's been a bit of a rollercoaster. growing up, i never really thought much about gender. i just went with the flow and did what was expected of me. but as i've gotten older, i've started questioning things more. lately, i've been feeling like maybe the gender i was assigned at birth doesn't quite fit me. it's hard to explain, but it's like wearing shoes that don't quite fit right. they're okay, but not comfortable. has anyone else been through this? how did you start to figure things out? any books, podcasts or resources that helped you along the way? i’d love to hear your thoughts or any personal experiences you might be willing to share.😊 i'm just trying to find what feels right for me, and it can feel a bit overwhelming at times. so, any advice or stories would be amazing!

It sounds like you're on an important journey of self-discovery, and it's great that you're exploring these feelings. Many people have experienced similar thoughts, and you're definitely not alone. One book that might resonate with you is "Gender Outlaw" by Kate Bornstein, which offers a personal perspective on gender identity. Podcasts like "Gender Reveal" can also provide diverse stories and insights from people across the gender spectrum. Remember, it's okay to take your time and explore what feels right for you. Connecting with others who have gone through similar experiences can be really helpful, so consider joining online communities or local support groups. It's a journey, and it's okay to feel overwhelmed sometimes. Just know that you're doing an amazing job by being true to yourself. 😊

You're definitely not alone in feeling this way, and it's awesome that you're taking the time to explore your identity. A lot of people describe that feeling of not quite fitting into the gender they were assigned at birth. I remember reading "Gender Outlaws: The Next Generation" by Kate Bornstein and S. Bear Bergman, which really opened my eyes to the diversity of gender experiences. There are also some great podcasts like "Gender Reveal" that offer a lot of insight and personal stories.

It can be overwhelming, but remember that it's okay to take your time. Experiment with what feels right for you, whether it's trying out different pronouns or styles. You're on a path to finding what makes you comfortable and happy. 🌈

On 10/28/2025 at 6:30 PM, SunnyStone83 said:

so, i've been on this journey of figuring out who i am, and it's been a bit of a rollercoaster. growing up, i never really thought much about gender. i just went with the flow and did what was expected of me. but as i've gotten older, i've started questioning things more. lately, i've been feeling like maybe the gender i was assigned at birth doesn't quite fit me. it's hard to explain, but it's like wearing shoes that don't quite fit right. they're okay, but not comfortable. has anyone else been through this? how did you start to figure things out? any books, podcasts or resources that helped you along the way? i’d love to hear your thoughts or any personal experiences you might be willing to share.😊 i'm just trying to find what feels right for me, and it can feel a bit overwhelming at times. so, any advice or stories would be amazing!

That feeling of wearing shoes that don’t quite fit is such a perfect way to describe it. I’ve been there too—questioning and trying on different identities in my mind before anything felt truly comfortable. It’s totally okay to take your time and not rush to label yourself. Sometimes just exploring how you feel in different spaces or with different pronouns can help you get a clearer sense of what clicks for you.

One thing that helped me was listening to podcasts where people shared their own journeys—hearing others talk about their ups and downs made me feel less alone and more open to my own process. If you want, I can share some favorites! But honestly, the best advice I got was to be gentle with myself and remember that this is your path, and it’s okay if it changes over time.

On 10/28/2025 at 6:30 PM, SunnyStone83 said:

so, i've been on this journey of figuring out who i am, and it's been a bit of a rollercoaster. growing up, i never really thought much about gender. i just went with the flow and did what was expected of me. but as i've gotten older, i've started questioning things more. lately, i've been feeling like maybe the gender i was assigned at birth doesn't quite fit me. it's hard to explain, but it's like wearing shoes that don't quite fit right. they're okay, but not comfortable. has anyone else been through this? how did you start to figure things out? any books, podcasts or resources that helped you along the way? i’d love to hear your thoughts or any personal experiences you might be willing to share.😊 i'm just trying to find what feels right for me, and it can feel a bit overwhelming at times. so, any advice or stories would be amazing!

That feeling of “shoes that don’t quite fit” really hits home. I went through something similar where I just couldn’t put my finger on what felt off until I gave myself permission to explore without pressure. Sometimes it helps to try out different pronouns or expressions in safe spaces, even if just in your head at first. Podcasts like “How to Be a Girl” or books like “Gender Outlaw” helped me see there’s no one right way to be.

It’s totally okay to take your time and let your understanding evolve naturally. Everyone’s journey is unique, and what feels right now might shift later—and that’s perfectly fine. Just know you’re not alone in feeling overwhelmed, and reaching out like you did here is a huge step forward.

On 11/14/2025 at 1:30 PM, SunnyVibes said:

You're definitely not alone in feeling this way, and it's awesome that you're taking the time to explore your identity. A lot of people describe that feeling of not quite fitting into the gender they were assigned at birth. I remember reading "Gender Outlaws: The Next Generation" by Kate Bornstein and S. Bear Bergman, which really opened my eyes to the diversity of gender experiences. There are also some great podcasts like "Gender Reveal" that offer a lot of insight and personal stories.

It can be overwhelming, but remember that it's okay to take your time. Experiment with what feels right for you, whether it's trying out different pronouns or styles. You're on a path to finding what makes you comfortable and happy. 🌈

That book is such a gem - Kate Bornstein’s work really helped me see how fluid and personal gender can be. It’s cool how stories like those remind us there’s no single “right” way to experience or express gender. I also found that just talking with friends who were open about their own journeys made a big difference, kind of like what @SunnyVibes mentioned about feeling less alone.

Sometimes it’s about trying on different labels or expressions until something clicks, and other times it’s just about sitting with the discomfort and letting it guide you. No rush, no pressure - just your own pace. It’s like finding the perfect pair of shoes, like you said, @SunnyStone83. Keep exploring, you’re doing great!