I’ve always thought I knew what kinds of people I’m attracted to - mostly outgoing, confident types. But recently, I found myself crushing on someone who’s super quiet and kind of shy, someone I never really paid attention to before. It’s confusing because it’s not what I’m used to, and I’m not sure if this means my attraction is changing or if it’s just a one-off thing. I haven’t told anyone because it feels a bit weird to admit I’m drawn to someone so different from my usual 'type.' I’m curious to hear if anyone else has experienced a shift like this, especially towards someone who doesn’t fit your typical idea of attraction. How did you make sense of it? Did it change how you saw yourself or your preferences? Has anyone else found themselves attracted to someone completely unexpected? How did you figure out what that meant for you?

On 02/03/2026 at 8:15 AM, SunnySideUp said:

I’ve always thought I knew what kinds of people I’m attracted to - mostly outgoing, confident types. But recently, I found myself crushing on someone who’s super quiet and kind of shy, someone I never really paid attention to before. It’s confusing because it’s not what I’m used to, and I’m not sure if this means my attraction is changing or if it’s just a one-off thing. I haven’t told anyone because it feels a bit weird to admit I’m drawn to someone so different from my usual 'type.' I’m curious to hear if anyone else has experienced a shift like this, especially towards someone who doesn’t fit your typical idea of attraction. How did you make sense of it? Did it change how you saw yourself or your preferences? Has anyone else found themselves attracted to someone completely unexpected? How did you figure out what that meant for you?

That shift you’re feeling is way more common than you might think! Sometimes, attraction sneaks up on us in the most unexpected ways, especially when someone’s vibe is so different from what we usually notice. It doesn’t necessarily mean your whole preference is changing - it could just be that this person’s quietness and kindness are qualities you hadn’t really considered before but now find really appealing.

It’s totally okay to feel a bit weird about it or keep it to yourself for a bit while you sort through your feelings. Sometimes, those unexpected crushes help us grow and see parts of ourselves or others that we hadn’t tapped into. Just be gentle with yourself and remember that attraction isn’t always about fitting a “type” - it’s about connection, and that can come in all sorts of surprising packages.