04-30-2011, 12:02 PM
(This post was last modified: 04-30-2011, 12:06 PM by BlackChaos.)
How NOT to get owned on facebook
In the sprawling shopping center of the mind, boredom is an incessant advertisement guy who keeps pushing flyers in your face, despite the uncensored death threats. In the online world, when people get bored, they do lots of things. Some make websites, a few sell stuff and a lot of people search for entertaining pictures on Google. Just sayin'.
But there are a select few, who decide to undertake the not-so-noble but highly rewarding art of øwning people.
Øwning people is a sport that existed ever since the existence of people who made fools of themselves. And this practice carries on through the Internet.
Now, øwnage is a one-sided business. One øwns, the other becomes the biggest idiot on the thread. But there are a few things one can do to avoid getting øwned. I'm nice enough to lay them out for you in plain English.
1. Refrain from posting statuses which identify you as desperate, shallow or mentally retarded.
This a sure way to ward off atleast 70% of ownage away from your wall.
2. Learn to use a keyboard/keypad properly
TYpInnGg Likee thIz will make you an easy target for many pre-prepared starting lines like "Is your keyboard having seizures?"
3. Keep it real. Use your damn name.
If for privacy reasons, you change your online name, then you completely missed the point of facebook. Go download AOL or Yahoo if you want an awkward screen name. Facebook is about connections and relations. And its hard to connect with anyone who has a clearly fake name.
Example: Dèsþérätê Tròublémäkèr, Thåt Uñkñøwñ Gûý
4. Keep your mouth shut
Don't post offensive or sarcastic comments unless you can handle the heat you get from others. Many a times, people with the intention to øwn someone just end up digging their own grave.
5. If you're caught in the heat, stay out of the kitchen
If you're caught on the other side of an øwnage, GET OUT. Simple.
When you see that you have no support, be smart and back out.
6. Don't try to "fix" it
You'll make it worse for yourself, and easier for them.
7. Don't argue with them
Arguing with someone who's trying to øwn you is like cooking yourself in an oven at 900 degrees Celsius. You end up getting burned BY YOURSELF. Just back out.
8. Girls don't be feminist, Guys don't be racist.
Its just begging for comments (-_-)
And finally,
9. Make friends with people who know what to do
If you have friends in your list who support you, and know what to do, then you're pretty much set. Nobody touches you or they get øwned.
Thanks for reading. Now go out there and try not to get øwned. Oh, and If you actually do any of these things, then I just øwned you.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
This article was mainly written for comedic purposes. Most of this is embellishment.
Don't be afraid to comment and rate it with your opinion =)
In the sprawling shopping center of the mind, boredom is an incessant advertisement guy who keeps pushing flyers in your face, despite the uncensored death threats. In the online world, when people get bored, they do lots of things. Some make websites, a few sell stuff and a lot of people search for entertaining pictures on Google. Just sayin'.
But there are a select few, who decide to undertake the not-so-noble but highly rewarding art of øwning people.
Øwning people is a sport that existed ever since the existence of people who made fools of themselves. And this practice carries on through the Internet.
Now, øwnage is a one-sided business. One øwns, the other becomes the biggest idiot on the thread. But there are a few things one can do to avoid getting øwned. I'm nice enough to lay them out for you in plain English.
1. Refrain from posting statuses which identify you as desperate, shallow or mentally retarded.
This a sure way to ward off atleast 70% of ownage away from your wall.
2. Learn to use a keyboard/keypad properly
TYpInnGg Likee thIz will make you an easy target for many pre-prepared starting lines like "Is your keyboard having seizures?"
3. Keep it real. Use your damn name.
If for privacy reasons, you change your online name, then you completely missed the point of facebook. Go download AOL or Yahoo if you want an awkward screen name. Facebook is about connections and relations. And its hard to connect with anyone who has a clearly fake name.
Example: Dèsþérätê Tròublémäkèr, Thåt Uñkñøwñ Gûý
4. Keep your mouth shut
Don't post offensive or sarcastic comments unless you can handle the heat you get from others. Many a times, people with the intention to øwn someone just end up digging their own grave.
5. If you're caught in the heat, stay out of the kitchen
If you're caught on the other side of an øwnage, GET OUT. Simple.
When you see that you have no support, be smart and back out.
6. Don't try to "fix" it
You'll make it worse for yourself, and easier for them.
7. Don't argue with them
Arguing with someone who's trying to øwn you is like cooking yourself in an oven at 900 degrees Celsius. You end up getting burned BY YOURSELF. Just back out.
8. Girls don't be feminist, Guys don't be racist.
Its just begging for comments (-_-)
And finally,
9. Make friends with people who know what to do
If you have friends in your list who support you, and know what to do, then you're pretty much set. Nobody touches you or they get øwned.
Thanks for reading. Now go out there and try not to get øwned. Oh, and If you actually do any of these things, then I just øwned you.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
This article was mainly written for comedic purposes. Most of this is embellishment.
Don't be afraid to comment and rate it with your opinion =)
![[Image: xzd39.png]](http://i.imgur.com/xzd39.png)
