Is brutal honesty a bad thing?

[BRAINI4C]

Elaborate please.

Ok well sometimes you need to tell someonethe truth but say a kid said to you they wanted to be a soccer player and you said to them that would never happen you would make the kid feal sad so to make the kid feal happy to would say to them do what ever you have to do to be a soccer player.

[iCry]

Not necessarily. It is okay to be brutally honest in certain situations, but you need to learn to control yourself because you can actually hurt people by just being honest.

[Bill Nye]

If everyone lies and says everything about everyone is great, then yeah, they will feel better about themselves.
But they won't look better, just feel that way.

Ex: 400 l.b person that everyone says isn't fat, as to not hurt their feelings.
They will most likely never lose weight, which would not be better for them in life, due to health conditions among other things.

But, if everyone commented on that person, yes, they would feel bad. But it would motivate them to lose that, which would help them later on.

[Gaijin]

No it is not bad at all!

I'm honest too... I'm more to say the first thing that will cross my mind than to think of an lie... ;D

To skip what been said, I will agree with Heli0s, ofcourse there is something I want to add...
Being honest can sometimes be difficult, yes! When a person asks you a question and will get upset by any answer you have for her/him, that will be the point where you need to think how to tell it to them... If you know the person you will also know how to express your self the right way, so that the person will understand better what you mean.

If you really have a "bad" answer for that person, try to tell it the way that will cheer the person up. Voice tone and all other stuff that can change ones emotions or stronger them....
Involving others, if possible, can also force the person to see the truth with their own eyes... The group always wins xD..

All in all, if it's a friend you will know how to tell it to them... If it's not a friend ... why would you care... just shout it out!
Being honest is not bad at all, the way you say the truth can sometimes "take your life"...

ps:
dial-up sucks... cYa

[nofear1999]

IMO I'd like someone to be 100% honest with me. So does 50% of my family.

[Ghostgirl]

No, English isn't my first language which is why I can only type or speak in English....

BTW, that is sarcasm in case you missed it.

Don't be so stupid. I know it's a descriptive term you fool. I think it's a good description for rude people like yourself. You do know that you can be honest without being brutal/mean right? If someone were being honest with me but polite, I would say they were honest. If they were a bitch like you, I would say they were brutal.

Phrases don't just appear from nowhere. They are coined for a reason and unless you can prove where that one came from, I'm going to interpret it as one that was coined for jerks like yourself.

I'll regard you as an adult once you are capable of holding a conversation without acting like a petulant 13 year old. Just because you can pretend you are an adult online doesn't make you one.

[Elektrisk]

No, English isn't my first language which is why I can only type or speak in English....

Right, because I know everything about you, right? There're many ESL people who can speak English fluently. Don't try to be sassy. I wasn't trying to insult you.

Don't be so stupid. I know it's a descriptive term you fool. I think it's a good description for rude people like yourself.

Your post would indicate otherwise.
Lol, how do you think you know I'm "rude"? You don't know me at all.
Don't even try to be a know it all. You joined this month. We've never even talked.

You do know that you can be honest without being brutal/mean right?

And what would suggest that I am mean? If I'm reading this right, you're the one calling me a "fool" and "stupid".

Or do you think it's a nice term?

I think it's descriptive. I think it's just that most people can't handle the truth, so they see it as a bad thing.

You can be honest and rude at the same time, didn't your parents teach you any manners?

Yes, but apparently yours didn't.

Don't be such a whiner.

What am I whining about, exactly? You are the one who is writing a 4 paragraph long post over a simple question.

And if you are going to pretend you are so smart, try to refrain from using insults I heard when I was in high school.

Pretending that I am smart? What gave you that notion? Was it because I thought to ask a simple question?
And again, I'd like to see these "insults". I wouldn't doubt it if you were still in high school, by the way you are trying to make a huge deal out of this.

You can be honest without being hurtful and I wouldn't be surprised if the phrase came from someone being a flat out jerk.

I'm sure it's pretty clear. You CAN'T be honest without being hurtful in many cases, because as I said, many people don't like the truth. Think:
"Does this dress make me look fat?"
"Yes."

That's honesty.

Saying, "Well, it brings out your eyes." isn't answering the question. In a way, it's being honest, but you aren't telling them what they asked.

Are you done now? Because you're being ridiculous.

[Ghostgirl]

You know what? Just let me sum this up fast.

I'm new here. I posted something that was harmless.

By asking me if I speak English, you weren't curious about whether I was deaf or not. That is ridiculous.

If you welcome new members by talking down to them, this site doesn't deserve a good reputation and that is entirely your fault. And rating me poorly because you were rude and I was rude back doesn't say much because I'm sure plenty of people with fewer than 100 posts dislike you and left because of this sort of "welcome".

[Elektrisk]

By asking me if I speak English, you weren't curious about whether I was deaf or not. That is ridiculous.

I never even mentioned deafness. Where are you getting this from?
I didn't even ask if you spoke English. I asked if it was your first language.

If you welcome new members by talking down to them, this site doesn't deserve a good reputation and that is entirely your fault.

I can't help it if you're PMSing. I asked if English was your first language. If you want to say that I had ill intentions, then go ahead, but I have already stated that I didn't.

And rating me poorly because you were rude and I was rude back doesn't say much because I'm sure plenty of people with fewer than 100 posts dislike you and left because of this sort of "welcome".

Ha! You edited your post, as if it isn't obvious by " Today, 12:52 AM (This post was last modified: Today 01:02 AM by Ghostgirl.)"
You said some very rude things, none of which are worth repeating. Don't try to manipulate the situation.

[Ghostgirl]

Umm, you are contradicting yourself.

First you claim that you have no way of knowing me.

Then you claim you know me well enough to know that I am "manipulating the situation".

Let me teach you something -- I have obsessive compulsive habits. One of them is editing posts a lot. I've been posting longer than you have been able to even use a computer and I've always done it. I react, re-read, re-react. Get over it, I have.

I misread your first post as you asking about ASL and not ESL. My fault but you were still rude. You have a very bad attitude and then I saw on your profile that it says you are 15 and I can see why. You are 15 and copping an attitude with someone for interpreting a phrase differently than yourself. How mature could you possibly be when you are acting so petulant.

Welcome to the internet. Not everyone agrees. When someone says "brutally honest", I think the person was mean. I can be honest without being mean. Phrases are coined for a reason. I don't think someone said, "How do you like my shirt?"

"Eh, it's okay but I don't really like the color."

"Wow, that was brutally honest."

It doesn't fit to me and I think you could show more manners than just outright saying, "No, I hate it, it's ugly." THAT is brutally honest to me. If you don't like that I feel that way, instead of asking me if I can't comprehend English, go research the phrase and once you find where it originated, get back to me.


And yes, I know I'm editing this and you can see it. Again, you're 15. This isn't new, dear. I've been using forums like this since I was your age so you aren't revealing anything new here so get over yourself.

Anyways, I very very highly suggest you get off that teenage holier-than-thou attitude and get over yourself because no one likes someone acting snotty. Now that I know you can't even drive a car without a parent in the passenger seat, I'm hardly going to sit here and waste my time arguing with you and I definitely know why I reacted in anger now -- kids bug me, haha, I don't even want any of my own (thankfully neither does the bf, phew). Now, I'm not against all kids but kids with 'tude, yes. I've been rated positively and negatively over the years, the high school popularity contest thing doesn't hurt my feelings. So sorry to let you down? Have a nice night, you should probably be in bed soon.