Questions I don't have answers for.

[majordave]

Thanks Major, that means a lot. You seem the most effective in this whole thread. My doesn't have much custody over me. Reason is they evaluated him and they seem he isn't a good parent to be taking care of me so that is why I am with my mother. Also, my fathers earnings is hidden since as I claimed he fixes diners with his business the people he works for pays him in cash upfront at the register. That is mainly how he hides any source of income he makes.

If your parents got divorced when you were 7? Mandatory joint custody laws have only recently been instituted in various states over the past 10 years and prior to that, mothers were awarded sole physical custody roughly 85-90% of the time. For a father to win custody in the past, the mother pretty much had to have given the children up voluntarily, be mentally or physically unfit, on drugs and/or in prison.

Aside from the fact that studies have shown that children do better when they have both their parents in their lives, studies have also shown that states that have instituted mandatory joint custody have far fewer "dead beat dads."

Raising children is expensive, but the joy of being able to share in all their experiences with them as they grow is well worth every penny.

Think of how you would feel if you and someone else bought a very expensive, beautiful sports car, and when the two of you broke up, they got to keep the car and have fun driving it every single day, while you had to keep making all the payments on that car for years and years, and only got to see the car you were paying for every other week for a few lousy hours? Wouldn't you feel you got a raw deal?

That's how your dad probably feels. Your mom's getting all the benefits of raising you, while all he gets is to foot the bill. Only it's worse because children are far more precious than a vehicle. It really isn't fair, and that's probably why he hides money. He's not hiding it from you, he's hiding it from her. He feels she is robbing him of his son, so he feels justified in robbing her of money in return.

And that's the very reason many men become "dead beat dads" and why more and more states are now making joint custody mandatory.

Hope this helps a little? And thanks!

[nofear1999]

Try talking to him, it will help.