Long Distance Relationship

[Gaijin]

Ok this is bugging me since december, and I just can't think of a way out!

Me and my gf are used to distance and are handling it pretty well for the last 18 months, as I'm switching between 2 locations it's not all the big time we're
away from each other.
Either I'm in Serbia chilling with her, or she visit me in Germany and we have fun.

Now here it is where the problem comes, shes got place on a University in US, and that's far away (far far away).
I never told her that that bugs me, well it doesn't really... I thought...
The biggest problem is that I'll not be able to sit in my car and just drive to her or vice versa.

My question is, how to handle that! We are not going to break up or something and we both trust each other about cheating and stuff.... so the distance is not a big problem.

It's my first time to have something like that and I just don't know what to do....
How do I get the green card, is it easy?
Is there a way to be able to fly to US any time, an upgraded green card or something, idk....

Money and time isn't a problem for me, and she can't leave the place for sometime now, it's up to me to visit her!

The point of the thread is, I need to be able to travle to US any time I want!

[Elektrisk]

OK, as for the traveling thing, look here: It's the US-Serbia embassy. I'm linking you to the page in Serbian Cyrillic, but you can view it in Serbian Latin or English if you want.
http://www.serbiaembusa.org/cir/

My opinion on long distance relationships (in this case) is that they don't work. Think of how much it's going to cost you to fly back and forth like that. You'll be traveling from Europe to North America twice each time; to and fro. I was in a long distance relationship with a guy from Texas (I live in Oklahoma; Oklahoma borders Texas) for 8 months, and since we are/were both teenagers, we didn't really have the option of seeing each other. After a while, I just realized, "OK, this isn't worth it. There's over 6 billion people on Earth. I'm only thirteen. This relationship is only making me miserable and giving me a heartache. Why am I in it?" I don't mean to sound presumptuous, but I assume that this is how you will start to feel once y'all's physical contact is limited.

I just don't see how you will be able to fly to and from the USA, even if you do it only once per month. That's just my opinion, anyway. If your main concern is how you will be able to travel thither legally, this should probably go in the OSHIT area (assuming Omni hasn't added a legal advice area).

[Gaijin]

Thank you for the link, the cyrillic is fine.

I've put this into Emotional section, because it's emotionaly killing me, as said we were able to see each other any time we wanted for now and even spend time having fun and stuff...
With the technology and Webcams nowdays, it will not be a problem to keep contact.
But as you said, it's a limited physical contact that is bugging me!!
And not being able to visit her or she visiting me, is a bit hard to think about....

We've been talkking how to handle that and I will not be an butthead telling her she should stay.... It's exactly what she wanted and I'll support her, but still this distance is something new to both of us... And no matter how much I trust her... I'm scared

edit:
The money for traveling is really not a problem and I'm able to work anywhere since I need to mail the work to my boss, so time is also not the question....

[Gone]

Really, love can prevail above all if you want it two. The joint force would be enough. As long as you keep constant communication, ex. msn cellphones etc.

[JDBar]

Communication is key. I'm going though something kind of similar. My girlfriend is in California, and I had to move to Ohio. We've been making it work so far for 1 year and a half (with visits), and I should hopefully be back to her the 2nd year.

If your love for each other is strong enough to withstand that lack of physical contact, then you can make it. However, it will be tough. I'd recommend visiting her when you have money and the time, but be prepared for the return trip to seem ten times more depressing. You just have to go with the flow and keep your promises, and hope the future will be better. You can't really keep track of each other, so there will probably be worrying in the back of your head often. Even though I have faith in my girlfriend (been together for about 3.5 years) I still worry about her, though I ask myself why I would doubt her. If one of you can't handle the lack of physical contact, then it will not end well.

[Skawke]

If money isn't a problem, did you consider moving with her to a place near the university then?

[Grizzly]

This is a lot like when I was deployed. My wife was in Texas, and I was in Iraq. No chance of visits there except 14 days sometime in between when we left and when we were set to come home, starting 4 months after we left and ending 4 months before we were to go back. I'm still married. Just communicate a lot and use webcam.

[Gaijin]

If money isn't a problem, did you consider moving with her to a place near the university then?

I'm considering taht and not because of her, but because I'm fascinated of US cities... But now I have a real reason to move there...
I just don't know, she will probably stay there after finishing and at that point I can get the greencard, but for now it looks like I have no chance of getting one.

This is a lot like when I was deployed. My wife was in Texas, and I was in Iraq. No chance of visits there except 14 days sometime in between when we left and when we were set to come home, starting 4 months after we left and ending 4 months before we were to go back. I'm still married. Just communicate a lot and use webcam.

First to say I'm glad it worked out good for you!
Relationship involing War can sometimes be tough and end without actually both wanting them to end...
But the communication is really not our problem, crap we can enjoy each other just thinking about the other.. ;)
The only thing now is that she want tbe able to travel back here any time soon... So it's up to me to go there!

[Grizzly]

Why wouldn't you be able to get a green card? You don't really need a green card right now, you need to apply for a student visa. It will allow you to stay here for a while. You may be able to apply for the green card very quickly after you get here, if not even before you leave your home country. I'm not sure on the policies for them. You're in Germany now right? Take a trip to Frankfurt, Berlin, or Munich (whichever is closest)

Here's a good link for you http://germany.usembassy.gov/germany/visa/index.html

[Gaijin]

I'll look about the policies IRL where people are there for such questions..
But thanks that's what I needed to know, so Student Visa is best for me, I guess....

I was talking to few people who were traveling, and they wre all talking about the green card and something, they just confused me as hell...