Should I stay, or should I go... (general life advice)

[PoisoNinja]

It all starts about 2 years ago, I was 17 and living in Texas. I was a junior in high school, had a lot of friends, I didn't think about the consequences of my actions.. My friends and I partied a lot and that was only the beginning... Needless to say, I got into drugs and alcohol, crap got crazy, I wasn't getting along with my mom or stepdad, I ended up dropping out of school (it was that or be expelled) and I basically lived at friends houses for the next 3 weeks until I decided to move to Indiana with my dad..
All of my friends wanted me to stay, some even offering to let me live with them, but I felt it was time to get away for a bit, to clear my head, and get my crap together..

Present Day: I'm still living in Indiana, I started going to a local community college last fall (currently out for summer), still don't have a job, have no friends, and I still have no direction..
This where it all gets weird though, about a month ago, I started talking to my mom about me going back out there, she was all excited about it... My dad got home that day, and was like "Well, I have some work for you, that could end up permanent if you do good..." (He's a painter btw) So I was just like "Alright, hell yeah" almost a month a half later, there's been only a few words said about it... And my mom is trying everything she possibly can to get me back out there, her and my stepdad have even lined up a job for me.... And I'm just stuck and don't know what to do; should I try to go back, or should I just push through here?? I enjoy living with my dad, but really don't enjoy my stepmom and her 5 kids.... I mean I smoke weed and I don't even buy my own crap, because it's already here... I'm just turning into even more of a mooch-bum than before and I can just feel it.. And for those that say to just stop smoking, if I say no to a joint that their trying to pass me, that don't turn out well...trust me, they think I have a chip on my shoulder then.. I just don't know what to do, I could be on my way to Texas tomorrow if I wanted, and to be honest that is what I want, but I just don't want to let my dad down, I just feel that he would be disappointed if I left, but then again, I'm now 19, I can't be chilling here forever...

I know that's not the prettiest post (or life, in that matter), but I just got it out in a way that others would hopefully be able to understand where I'm coming from..

P.S. I know I skipped the introduction, but I'll get to it ;P

[ily]

Go back to your home mate. Be with your mom. But visit your dad regularly. Short but it is the truth.

[PoisoNinja]

Thanks, dude.

Go back to your home mate....

That really sums up how I feel...
The main thing that is getting me though is that I don't know how to break it to him... But it really needs to be done, I've been living here for two years and everything I own fits into a small cardboard box and a suitcase...

[ily]

Just sit him down and tell him like a man. Tell him you need to go back but you still want to visit him regularly?

[PoisoNinja]

Deep down, I know that's all that needs to be done... it is about time I start acting like a man..
And visiting, I didn't even really think about that.. that could make things go a little easier. I just don't want him to think I took advantage of him, but I guess that's something that I'll just have to say when I talk to him...

[boosting_services]

Hey dude, you're right...This place isn't a place too talk about personal problems but wait, don't judge my anwser. I sometimes find it easier too ask people I don't know. I don't know why but I just do. Anyway, I think you should go back home, where you belong but ofcourse, your Dad has helped you over the last two years so visit him regulary.

- Good Luck

[ily]

If you feel you took advantage of him then pay him back. But you didn't, he was just bring a father and doing what a father should be doing.

[PoisoNinja]

Hey dude, you're right...This place isn't a place too talk about personal problems but wait, don't judge my anwser. I sometimes find it easier too ask people I don't know. I don't know why but I just do....

Yeah sorry about that, I forgot to delete that first part, I was going to put this on a forum that I regularly attend, but figured I should find somewhere more appropriate.. my bad lolz, I'll edit it out..

@ily, My moms been saying the exact same thing, "he's a dad, he's doing what he's supposed to do..."
I guess you guys are right.. I just have to get over myself and make a change..

[ily]

Whatever you do just know that they are your family. And they will always be there for you.

[boosting_services]

Yeah sorry about that, I forgot to delete that first part, I was going to put this on a forum that I regularly attend, but figured I should find somewhere more appropriate.. my bad lolz, I'll edit it out..

@ily, My moms been saying the exact same thing, "he's a dad, he's doing what he's supposed to do..."
I guess you guys are right.. I just have to get over myself and make a change..

I agree with ily. You probably should go home but don't just listen too us. It's not our life, it's yours. You should do what YOU think is best although you've still had our opinions