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i need some help improving my life.
#1
Oh boy here we go SF.

I signed up mainly for support forums because i knew that this place will most likely help me with my problems in life so i guess starting now since im feeling a little down today im going to start telling u guys/girls some things i want to improve on in my life

I am only 17 years old and ive fallen in love and it turned around and smacked me hard in the face.... i dated a girl for 2 years and she cheated on me because of that i went and did drugs and turned down the wrong rode and pretty much screwed up my hole teenage life i dropped out of HS and would drop ecstacy and acid all the time and ended up turning to cocain and other hardcore drugs (mainly psychedelics).

Because i was hurt so bad i now have depression and anxiety and im bi polar Sad

i randomly have mood swings where i get all depressed and think about how im a loner and do nothing but sit online all day.... but we have a little problem actually its a huge problem and this is what i want to overcome before i overcome anything else.


I am very socially awkward expecially around girls.. and if they are attractive its even worse i mean i cant even walk twords a cute girl without looking down and feeling awkward Omg

i have something to admit too also...
i have really only had online relationships ive never really been the type of person to go to the mall or something with people because i want a girlfriend but im afraid of rejection...


if anyone can seriously help me i want to learn how to not be so socially awkward and go out and start talking to girls and try to find a real girlfriend because this hole internet thing is really getting annoying + there is alot of drama on the internet.


These are also some things i want to work on..

1. Anger management

2. Being controlling

3. Jealousy & trust issues..

4. Awkwardness + Shyness

5. Depression [ i used to cut myself all the time Sad ]


Please no trolls.... ive posted on HF before and i was told to come here im seriously looking for help ( i dont have health insurance at the moment )
so i cant seek professional help sadly..

Thank u for taking ur time to read this.
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#2
Greetings.

Before you start going to start talking to girls, you should start putting your life back to place, and stop smoking. That is the reason why she basically dumped you right? Even if you got the courage talking to another girl, the girl will just break your heart again and then cheat on you and make you depressed and all that because you smoke. To be honest, I'm not fond of smokers either.

Quote:She cheated on me because of that i went and did drugs and turned down the wrong rode and pretty much screwed up my hole teenage life i dropped out of HS and would drop ecstacy and acid all the time and ended up turning to cocain and other hardcore drugs

What makes you think that if you get with another girl that she won't cheat on you again? I think you have more IMPORTANT problems than just being socially awkward with girls. If you can't stop smoking, then i suggest going to a therapist or a psychiatrist, whatever one helps cure smoking. And then go back to high school and finish it and get your diploma, or get a GED. You'll be racking up girls in no time, and the girls you date will be more loyal than the one who cheated on you.


Well, you ARE a loner. If you don't want to stay online all day, then go out and do something. Go eat at a restaurant, or go work out at a gym. You can even go watch a movie that just came out. I can't help you just because you think you have nothing to do. The world is full of interesting things. Why don't you just go explore it? You can even go around shopping or just take a walk on the beach, and just look at the nature.


Now depending on your situation, this can go two ways. Your either scared that if you talk with a girl and then go out with them, that they'll just cheat on you with someone else like your ex girlfriend did. Or, that you're just shy to talk to a girl because you get more and more shy around an attractive girl. This is why you should start putting your life back on the correct path before doing anything with girls.

If you talk to a girl, just be yourself. You can talk to a girl just about anything. Their pretty good listeners. Now I can't basically tell you to go up there and grow a pair and just talk to the girl, because you'll most likely will not because you're just too shy. Boys are always shy around girls. But they gain the courage. Just be confident about each and every situation, and just go up to her and just start asking a girl how their day was and just go from there. If you even get far, then ask if they want to go watch a movie or something. Or you can ask them for their number and then call them on the phone and start talking about your day.

You should be pretty much open with any girl. If you can talk to a girl, then it won't be awkward. But if you like sweat, and turn red, and your voice cracks around them, then that's pretty awkward according to the girl. Just have fun with it, and start flirting with the girl. But don't go on to strong right when you just met her. Just start talking about something and as you become more friendly then you'll be able to get to know her more. And the good thing about an attractive girl, is that you can compliment her, and she'll think it's cute. But just make sure that it's not one of those shallow girls that only like a guy based on looks. Never go for one of the fake girls like that.

GoodLuck!
- Brandenx781

Quote:I have really only had online relationships

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HJT Team. Deltron <3 RDCA <3 Quintus <3
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#3
(06-15-2011, 02:56 PM)Brandenx781 Wrote: Greetings.

Before you start going to start talking to girls, you should start putting your life back to place, and stop smoking. That is the reason why she basically dumped you right? Even if you got the courage talking to another girl, the girl will just break your heart again and then cheat on you and make you depressed and all that because you smoke. To be honest, I'm not fond of smokers either.

No she did not leave me because i smoke + i smoke for medical reasons not just because i enjoy getting high even i do love weed tho <3.

She left me because i figured out she was cheating on me and kept bringing the subject up whenever she would do something and she went out to a party and cheated on me again after we had gotten in a fight about the first time she cheated on me.


Quote:
Now depending on your situation, this can go two ways. Your either scared that if you talk with a girl and then go out with them, that they'll just cheat on you with someone else like your ex girlfriend did. Or, that you're just shy to talk to a girl because you get more and more shy around an attractive girl. This is why you should start putting your life back on the correct path before doing anything with girls.

I am afraid of being cheated on again but im more shy around attractive girls because i am afraid of rejection.


Quote: If you talk to a girl, just be yourself. You can talk to a girl just about anything. Their pretty good listeners. Now I can't basically tell you to go up there and grow a pair and just talk to the girl, because you'll most likely will not because you're just too shy. Boys are always shy around girls. But they gain the courage. Just be confident about each and every situation, and just go up to her and just start asking a girl how their day was and just go from there. If you even get far, then ask if they want to go watch a movie or something. Or you can ask them for their number and then call them on the phone and start talking about your day.

You should be pretty much open with any girl. If you can talk to a girl, then it won't be awkward. But if you like sweat, and turn red, and your voice cracks around them, then that's pretty awkward according to the girl. Just have fun with it, and start flirting with the girl. But don't go on to strong right when you just met her. Just start talking about something and as you become more friendly then you'll be able to get to know her more. And the good thing about an attractive girl, is that you can compliment her, and she'll think it's cute. But just make sure that it's not one of those shallow girls that only like a guy based on looks. Never go for one of the fake girls like that.

I had a smile on my face the hole time reading this part :3

this is the thing tho... im afraid to actually go up to a girl and start a converstation im fine once the converstation is started.
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#4
Im going to try to help you by telling you about me. Im 16, and i have a girlfriend. Ive known her for like 3 years, weve dated several times. The first few times didnt work out because it was so awkward around her. I use to be really shy around girls, i would sometimes even turn red. I think the best solution to this issue, is to find a girl you can be comfortable with and just be yourself. Dont try to be somebody she wants you to be, if you doesnt like you for you, then she doesnt need to be with you. IF your afraid to go up to a girl and talk to her, thats not the only way to talk to her. You can always try to talk to her on facebook first to get to know her, and if you seem like you want to be with her and see how it goes, try to get her number or meet her in person. Then you really need to be yourself, be cool. Also, im not going to talk much about depression, because i cant really help with that, but i am aware that that is a big issue today.

[Image: iddyEs.png]
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#5
(06-16-2011, 01:00 AM)Most Dope Wrote: Im going to try to help you by telling you about me. Im 16, and i have a girlfriend. Ive known her for like 3 years, weve dated several times. The first few times didnt work out because it was so awkward around her. I use to be really shy around girls, i would sometimes even turn red. I think the best solution to this issue, is to find a girl you can be comfortable with and just be yourself. Dont try to be somebody she wants you to be, if you doesnt like you for you, then she doesnt need to be with you. IF your afraid to go up to a girl and talk to her, thats not the only way to talk to her. You can always try to talk to her on facebook first to get to know her, and if you seem like you want to be with her and see how it goes, try to get her number or meet her in person. Then you really need to be yourself, be cool. Also, im not going to talk much about depression, because i cant really help with that, but i am aware that that is a big issue today.

Well man thank u for the feedback and ive alway's tried doing that thing with meeting people on the internet then meetng up IRL

and most of the time after it happening the person eather flakes or doesent turn out to be what they set an example of over the internet Sad

Plus i feel that i need to get out more but i dont want to be alone TBH i dont really have much friends in real life sadly Sad
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