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Today wasn't one of the best days i've had
#1
I've never posted anything in here before, but I just need to get my ideas out to vent my emotions for this. April always seems to be a bad month for me lol I don't know what it is about this month..

My girlfriend that i've been going out with a year just broke up with me, and i'll be completely honest, i've never had a harder breakup in my life. This one's really tough for me. Now that I realise what i've lost I feel like sh*t lol... I truly never had a better girlfriend in my life. Everything about this girl was perfect for me. She was beautiful inside and out, and was a very supportive, caring, smart, and kind person. I've been thinking about it all day, but I haven't been able to come up with words to say to anyone because of how much this has affected me.

Lately she's just had busy weekends, and after a year the attraction kinda just died out a bit to one of it's lower points in time. She decided to just become friends since it couldn't be anything long-term, but I really think I just got sh*t out of luck. There wasn't anything I could do about her being too busy to go on a couple date nights here and there.

Just needed to get my ideas out there into something comprehend-able for myself. If any of you have anything to share that you think would help me feel free to comment in this thread. I'd appreciate that

Hopefully i'll be able to move on or do something fast, because this is one of the worst feelings i've ever had. Just feels like my heart broke into a few pieces and were hidden in different places on earth lol. It's going to be a journey to put my life back together after this downset. I don't think anyone really realizes something great until it's gone or they've lost it. That's where true gratitude and appreciation comes from. I didn't understand that today, and i've been through life for a decent amount of years now.
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#2
Im sorry your feeling this way i know that pain.Try and hang with some friends,do stuff you usually dont do.Listen to some rock.Try and lift your spirit Smile the pain will fade away bro.Good luck bro.
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#3
Well you seem to still have your head on your shoulders properly, do you have any interest in trying to get her back or do you think that won't happen or perhaps are ready to move on?

I know it may be irrelevant to you since your views may differ from mine but I personally would be celebrating the fact that I'm newly single and doing whatever I could to take my mind off it.

You may not want to hear this part but if she truly loved you, in my opinion anyways, she would have made time for you. There is always time for someone you love.
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#4
Wow, sorry Infinity. Just move on, and flirt with some new girls. Thats what I am doing, I used to have a crush on a chick for 3 years. Damn thats bad, never got her either. Screw that, move on. Your better than that.
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#5
(04-11-2011, 07:57 PM)iNviZ Wrote: Im sorry your feeling this way i know that pain.Try and hang with some friends,do stuff you usually dont do.Listen to some rock.Try and lift your spirit Smile the pain will fade away bro.Good luck bro.

Thanks, it's good to hear some sympathetic comments like this at first Smile lol


(04-11-2011, 08:04 PM)Swat Runs Train Wrote: Well you seem to still have your head on your shoulders properly, do you have any interest in trying to get her back or do you think that won't happen or perhaps are ready to move on?

I know it may be irrelevant to you since your views may differ from mine but I personally would be celebrating the fact that I'm newly single and doing whatever I could to take my mind off it.

You may not want to hear this part but if she truly loved you, in my opinion anyways, she would have made time for you. There is always time for someone you love.

I think this is the most controversial thing. Should I try and get her back, or should I move on? I honestly don't have a clue there buddy lol. There's 2 roads to go like you've said, but it's damn hard to choose one.. I'm going to have quite a bit of trouble with that part. Just need to take some time out to think after calming down for a day or two. I don't think it would be wise to make the decision right now. I wouldn't consider this my highest mind set i'm able to reach for now.

Some people are like that, and in some ways, it's kinda good to be back single again. You get to do what you love to do, have more personal space and freedom.

I could understand that part about you saying that she would make time for me. I know if I loved someone I would make time for them and sacrifices to create that time. But in some of those cases, it was time between me or her family, so i'm not sure how far she would be willing to push that boundary. I would understand with family though for sure. Great advice though.. I've got a few things to think about to get myself back together again.


(04-11-2011, 08:06 PM)The High Roller Wrote: Wow, sorry Infinity. Just move on, and flirt with some new girls. Thats what I am doing, I used to have a crush on a chick for 3 years. Damn thats bad, never got her either. Screw that, move on. Your better than that.

It's quite alright, life's rollercoaster has it's ups and downs. You know when you get at the bottom, you gotta come right back up to the top soon enough for another time. I know it's tough having a crush on a girl for a while lol. Happened to me a few times before, with a girl that already had a boyfriend, but we were best friends for years before that.

I'd like to think i'm better then that, but you know nobody is perfect. People have weaknesses, but I really thought it would work out. We were going strong for a while there, and then all of a sudden it was like we hit a dead end or a road block lol.

I appreciate that though man Smile
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#6
Damn Infinity, I know how that feels. Been a year and a half for me and I'm still picking up the pieces... just stay strong and hope for the best. If you need any help, feel free to PM me for my messenger details (Skype, MSN, AIM). Best of luck to you bro.
We all have things we want to say, but not publicly. We all need help with them at one point. If you want a private conversation or seek private help, send me a PM.
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#7
Dude i believe everything happens for a reason.Im glad to see you keeping your head up and staying positive.This girl doesnt know what she lost.
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#8
(04-11-2011, 08:57 PM)Veryx Wrote: Damn Infinity, I know how that feels. Been a year and a half for me and I'm still picking up the pieces... just stay strong and hope for the best. If you need any help, feel free to PM me for my messenger details (Skype, MSN, AIM). Best of luck to you bro.

Yeah.. It's a real kick in the a** lol. I know i'll live no matter what the outcome is, it's just hard to get through the tougher times. The more you love the person too, the harder it seems to be apparently. The thing that i've always noticed, is that it takes you a while to realise that the good thing has ended. One the day of the breakup it's like you don't feel a thing, and you think you can accept it, but the day after it hits you in the face and your true emotions come out lol. I'm just going to wake up tomorrow and my goal is to figure out how to get through the day.

Today was pretty bad, it was going smooth until around lunchtime when I got the bad news. The sun was even out lol. Then it was almost like half an hour after I got dumped that the weather went to crap. The clouds turned grey and it started to hail even. Ironic symolism isn't it? haha. I probably would have never paid as much attention if it wasn't a day like this though.

You tend to notice a lot more when you're in a depressed state. Even the littlest things can become amusing. I still have strong feelings for her, but what makes it even worse is that I know there are 2 other guys that are interested in her. She doesn't know though because she used to spend more time with me instead. I would hate to see one of them try their luck at her within the first week though. That would really make things worse.

You know how it is though, human nature. You still will feel a connection with the person you love even though that symbolic bond is broken between having a relationship.

One thing that i'm thinking about now is whether or not I should be going back for her or not. I'm a tough guy, I can ride it out until my mental state heals, with time as my doctor, but that's going to be the biggest barrier to break. I'll have to come to a fork in the road with 2 paths soon to make my decision. But that will probably be by the end of this week.

She told me that she really felt that it would work in the beginning as well when she broke up with me. So how could something change so quickly? If I can learn from any mistake that i've made at least I could benefit from that and grow stronger. I have no idea what that means, but it's difficult to talk to her about it so soon after this event. There's usually an awkward distance between the 2 people for a while anyways.

I really think it's between us though, how this story will go. We, will have to figure that out..

(04-11-2011, 09:05 PM)iNviZ Wrote: Dude i believe everything happens for a reason.Im glad to see you keeping your head up and staying positive.This girl doesnt know what she lost.

Things can go two ways though as well. I know she was a great person, i've had tons and tons of compliments on how good of a "catch" I had lol. I guess that's not really helping me though. I like the sympathy, but comments like that do not help me at all with my mental rehabilitation haha. I do know very well what I lost for now though, I've had lots of experiences in life, but this was a unique one for me. Even if she wasn't the one for me, she's an amazing person. I even let her know that today.

Staying positive is key, whether I get another second chance by luck, or my time has ended to start anew. Time keeps ticking though, so it'll unravel itself at some point in time for my future. When you get going in a different direction then planned for your visioned future though, it confuses the hell out of you lol.
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#9
(04-11-2011, 09:10 PM)Infinity Wrote: Yeah.. It's a real kick in the a** lol. I know i'll live no matter what the outcome is, it's just hard to get through the tougher times. The more you love the person too, the harder it seems to be apparently. The thing that i've always noticed, is that it takes you a while to realise that the good thing has ended. One the day of the breakup it's like you don't feel a thing, and you think you can accept it, but the day after it hits you in the face and your true emotions come out lol. I'm just going to wake up tomorrow and my goal is to figure out how to get through the day.

Today was pretty bad, it was going smooth until around lunchtime when I got the bad news. The sun was even out lol. Then it was almost like half an hour after I got dumped that the weather went to crap. The clouds turned grey and it started to hail even. Ironic symolism isn't it? haha. I probably would have never paid as much attention if it wasn't a day like this though.

You tend to notice a lot more when you're in a depressed state. Even the littlest things can become amusing. I still have strong feelings for her, but what makes it even worse is that I know there are 2 other guys that are interested in her. She doesn't know though because she used to spend more time with me instead. I would hate to see one of them try their luck at her within the first week though. That would really make things worse.

You know how it is though, human nature. You still will feel a connection with the person you love even though that symbolic bond is broken between having a relationship.

One thing that i'm thinking about now is whether or not I should be going back for her or not. I'm a tough guy, I can ride it out until my mental state heals, with time as my doctor, but that's going to be the biggest barrier to break. I'll have to come to a fork in the road with 2 paths soon to make my decision. But that will probably be by the end of this week.

She told me that she really felt that it would work in the beginning as well when she broke up with me. So how could something change so quickly? If I can learn from any mistake that i've made at least I could benefit from that and grow stronger. I have no idea what that means, but it's difficult to talk to her about it so soon after this event. There's usually an awkward distance between the 2 people for a while anyways.

I really think it's between us though, how this story will go. We, will have to figure that out..

(04-11-2011, 09:05 PM)iNviZ Wrote: Dude i believe everything happens for a reason.Im glad to see you keeping your head up and staying positive.This girl doesnt know what she lost.
Things can go two ways though as well. I know she was a great person, i've had tons and tons of compliments on how good of a "catch" I had lol. I guess that's not really helping me though. I like the sympathy, but comments like that do not help me at all with my mental rehabilitation haha. I do know very well what I lost for now though, I've had lots of experiences in life, but this was a unique one for me. Even if she wasn't the one for me, she's an amazing person. I even let her know that today.

Staying positive is key, whether I get another second chance by luck, or my time has ended to start anew. Time keeps ticking though, so it'll unravel itself at some point in time for my future. When you get going in a different direction then planned for your visioned future though, it confuses the hell out of you lol.

From what I've seen around the forums of you, I think you'll do fine.

Just don't do what I did and be rude to her after... I know what you mean about the first day, then the next day I was angry and it didn't end out to well...

I would wait for a bit, if you still have those strong feelings then you go after her. It's been a year and a half, I still have those feelings and I'm making my move in the next few days when she moves back to Cali. Whatever you choose though, I wish you luck.
We all have things we want to say, but not publicly. We all need help with them at one point. If you want a private conversation or seek private help, send me a PM.
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#10
(04-11-2011, 09:17 PM)Veryx Wrote: From what I've seen around the forums of you, I think you'll do fine.

Just don't do what I did and be rude to her after... I know what you mean about the first day, then the next day I was angry and it didn't end out to well...

I would wait for a bit, if you still have those strong feelings then you go after her. It's been a year and a half, I still have those feelings and I'm making my move in the next few days when she moves back to Cali. Whatever you choose though, I wish you luck.

I appreciate the support, I've done that before as well, however I didn't mean it lol. That was the old days though, I learned from that mistake Smile

I have every intention to try and keep things "normal" and not awkward whenever I see her, it just won't be as often, because now that i'm not "with" her I have no reason to be chasing her down to spend time with her. If I end up becoming friends with her though, I do know that I don't want to see her with another guy. If that happens, I would just end all contact right there and then. I don't want to have any part of the feelings that would result from that lol, I know how it is.

I still have an option to get her back, but if I do, if my all doesn't quite cut it for her, then I'm not going to go down the begging method. If it IS truly done, then it's done. The hardest and most conflicting part in that point in time would be trying to accept the reality.

I'm going to keep my vision straight for now, keep my head up and climb out of the hole i'm in right now. Easier said then done, but you can't dwell on the things that trouble you in life for too long.

One of the main reasons I created this thread is for the fact that I just needed to understand myself at this point in time. I felt pretty confused earlier, and writing is a good way to understand your own emotions because things are easier put into perspective.
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