Lonely and Depressed

[[Insanity]]

I've become so lonely and depressed lately.. i don't even know why.

My uncle was chilling over at my place tonight. Right when he left, i just got really lonely. I have no one to talk to..


Now, I'm just sitting here randomly crying. It's not even cause he left, I just really need to talk to someone. I've been feeling slightly suicidal lately..However, I'm not one to kill myself ( i hope ).


I want a therapist, but they're expensive.

Age: 14

Just to throw this out there, I always get the "you're so handsome" stuff...but it's never from girls my age, you know? So i still feel insecure..I'm too scared to ask girls out. Like..i've never had a girlfriend once in my life. I want one. I want someone to spend time with. Someone to kiss and hug. I don't even want sex. I don't want to have sex 'til i get married...

And it's like...i'm such a freakin nerd.

I'm in 10th grade taking pre calculus, honors lit, honors history, honors chem, and C++ programming..

Now, it doesn't have to be this way, but i've found myself having to help people with their homework (well, more like DO IT for them), in order for them to talk to me..


People say I always look nervous when I walk down the street..i don't know why, it's probably because i feel so uncomfortable walking alone and not having anyone to talk to). I just switched from a different school and i used to walk with friends every day after school. I don't know how to conduct myself without someone next to me, talking.. So yeah, offtopic,but now I'm crying again..Every time i think of my problems and think of having to tell them to a therapist, they overwhelm me again and I cry more..

Me having to do other's homework is kinda alright..I mean. I'd much rather be doing my own studies, but i want to talk to someone. And just my luck, my school has like individual cubicles in rows.. I'm in a row with about 20 desks and only 3 of them have people in them. Other rows are full. Like I said, I'm so freakin lonely.


When i go home, i have like 70 people online on facebook, but i don't really talk to ANY of them..only my family. i hate when my family isn't online. when i check and none of them are on, i want to cry again. i'm getting really sick of being alive, tbh.

Also, people say i always look depressed..I just start daydreaming. I'm becoming more and more distant from this world..Not to brag ( I HATE BRAGGING..i hate even telling people this) But I'm really smart. I got an intelligence test and I'm a genius..But lately, I've become so distant from this world..and so ..almost slow. I can't understand it. For example, this morning, i was at the bus/train station. I had my ticket and i was just like staring at the machine. i was totally out of it. I came back to my senses when some lady behind me rudely said something like ," ARE YOU GOING TO GO!?" She said it with the snobbiest voice ever too. I didn't even turn around or say anything, either. I just put my ticket in and almost ran off..

Please.Please. I'm begging you guys. I want to live..

I was talking on the internet to someone. He said people like me, being extremely intelligent and antisocial/socially unaccepted, end up being billionaires and very powerful people..

The problem is. I don't want that. I really don't. I hate money. I hate evil. I hate all the things money has caused to happen in this world.... I cry when i see injustice. I can't stand history class, it makes me sick to see the cruel things that have taken place..

Please...help.

[Mao]

I understand man, I'm alone in my dorm too. Well, I have a roommate, but he's too "cool" to even stop by. I feel the same about my family, specially my dad. I also cry out of plane loneliness. And ever since college started, all the friends I have are shallow, so there's not a person to talk about things like these. Until one day, I couldn't take it anymore, it was pulling my grades down. I talked to my dad about it, and believe me, just telling your dad everything you feel can lift all the weight of your shoulders. Talk to your family about it, they'll make you feel better. Hope this helps man, and take care of yourself.

[Swat Runs Train]

Are you relatively shy? It's terribly hard to make new friends if so, you need to be more outgoing, rather than waiting for others to strike up a conversation. Set yourself up for situations that require social interaction and take the lead.

Another note is confidence, you need some, the right amount of confidence in yourself and your abilities will help you in every tiny little thing you and the big things as well, from social interaction such as your love life all the way through critical deciscion making, you shouldn't second guess yourself.

To get the ball rolling you need to get involved in something, a club or a sport perhaps, whatever suits your interests best.

Daydreaming isn't always sympton of depression, I'm sure everyone, no matter how good or bad their life is has done it at one point or another, usually just means you have an active and healthy imagination.

[hinubz]

look at it this way ..when your a total badass ( when your running your own buisness) ..cuz your smart as hell it seems ..ladies will be all over you

[Eve]

I understand how you feel. There is no easy solution, but what you are doing by sharing your thoughts here, is the right step.

It sounds as though you spend a lot of time with your own thoughts and introspection is a quality that can occur along with intelligence. The trap is that intelligence has to be expressed in a productive way, or it can quickly lead you into a spiral of unhappiness. Sometimes you cannot choose your feelings, but you can choose how to act on them, or how to improve them. This means that when recognise yourself getting sad, or confused, you take steps to make yourself feel better. Over time, you will create ways that will ease your negative feelings. For example, when I feel unhappy, I treat myself to a perfumed bath, or a window-shopping stroll.

It also helps when you find ideas you can relate to, either in real life or in the arts. Schedule times to access different art forms, for example music playlists, films, literature, galleries and museums. Many artworks are created to inspire feelings of hope and inspiration, and over time you will find it easy to access these feelings within yourself as well.

[Gadget]

You've got some tough classes. I remember Honors Lit. It was one of my favorite classes in the 9th grade. Are you in Magnet? I'm not sure about your school, but at mine in 9th grade you take Biology, 10th is Physics, and in 11th and 12th you can choose between a wide range of classes. I'm taking Anatomy. Are you on block schedule (4 classes) or do you have 8? Well I'm guessing 4 since the Magnet program in our state allows you to chose one elective per semester if you're in it.

You should look into some funner classes. Does your school have a Weight Training class? I sign up for one ever semester at my school. It's great. It's helped me out a lot with getting out there and socializing. Another class that has helped me a lot is Graphic Arts, I've met a lot of cool people in that class. We get to mess around with Illustrator, CS, and all that jaz. There isn't any pressure or anything, you just focus on expressing yourself. Clubs are also a good thing to try. I think you'd probably be into Habitat for Humanity or something of that sort. We go out and build houses for people. (Your school probably has something similar.) Look for something that you like. And if there isn't anything you feel like you would want to join, talk to a teacher and see about making your own club. You could do anything you wanted. We've got some outrageous ones at my school, like the Ping pong club. (Ping pong, I know. XD)

You said you hated injustices, ect? You should do some volunteer work then! I sometimes go and work with my local animal shelter. The stuff you do isn't really hard and might not seem important, (Like cleaning poop out of cages. XD) but it really helps. Churches also have some really good programs where you can go pick up trash and build houses. Even if you're not religious, you should look into it. I'm an Atheist myself. After I do a big project I usually feel really good about myself.

And I have the same problem about being antisocial after school hours. I'm usually locked up in my room after I get home. If you're like me, you probably get bored pretty easily. (You're already coding so that's great. ) So you should look into some other stuff, like photoshop, ect. Another thing I like to do is watch anime, if you don't already. I feel like I can relate to some of the characters in the anime that I watch better than any of the people I know in real life. It sounds like you'd like Death Note or CG. I know of some others too if you want to PM me.

If you need anyone to talk to you can add my MSN, Lust4thrust@live.com or you can PM me. Hope you start feeling better soon buddy.

[Tyler The Creator™]

If your randomly crying you need to get some type medical help to get an anti depressant

[Knight]

Don't worry bro, when the right lady comes along; everything just kind of shifts to work her into your life. I never thought I would meet the girl I'm with right now, but it just sort of happened.

[Jack-]

Don't worry bro, when the right lady comes along; everything just kind of shifts to work her into your life. I never thought I would meet the girl I'm with right now, but it just sort of happened.

That's 100% true. Definitely don't feel insecure about not having a girlfriend. I will never truly know how I got my 1st girlfriend, she was beautiful and two grades ahead of me. Like Istandor said, you can't anticipate meeting the right girl.

Moving away from that, I've felt the same way as you. I have always had a close group of friends since I was little, but there have been long spans of time when I was seriously depressed, and contemplated suicide.

It might be different for other people, but what I did and suggest is that you find something new to do. Try to find something, like a club, activity, or sport where you can meet new people, and have something to channel your energy into. This is the best suggestion that I can offer because I know it worked for me.

In your case (no offense) it might be great for you to do something outside of school if your worried about people's opinions of you. You will have a new chance, and you can make new first impressions. Don't ever give up hope that you will get out of it. Trust me, don't ever, ever, think about doing suicide. When I was depressed I cut myself, and I wanted to die. I didn't and to this day I am unbelievably happy that I didn't.

Even if it feels like your never going to get out of it, you can feel better within a week. If you need any serious help you can pm me. I'm always open to talk to about this sort of thing.

- Jack

[kamrald]

If you're depressed and lonely, there are several ways to manage this very common emotional and psychological issues, depending on how these questions is because your personal life.While these problems are common causes everyone to feel deeply hurt, and can provide only short-term depression, many people are able to manage and get out of these deep gorges of emotional darkness. normal channels of support and the healing power of time can eventually help bring a person to a normal balance in life. But there are many people who constantly feel depressed, regardless of positive change in the circumstances, loving support of family and friends, and enough time to heal some of the storms of life.