10-22-2014, 06:58 AM
You're not crazy. You're depressed and frustrated. Your condition is quite normal really, and I can say this with confidence because I felt the same way in highschool when I was depressed. Do you have access to a school counselor? Or maybe a Psychologist? The reason I ask is because you've obviously got some issues that you need to address, and those issues can be almost impossible, if not impossible to resolve on your own. I too feel very confident and comfortable in the earlier hours of the morning. It's easer to be at peace with everything, but you can't live like this. I'd strongly recommend a visit to the school counselor and/or a psychologist. The fact that you're having homicidal thoughts is somewhat concerning. Everybody feels like killing their parents at one point or another but you shouldn't be fantasizing about it and the whole concept should seem completely crazy to you and if it's not, you really do need some kind of help before things escalate. Do you work out a lot? Do you socialize with anyone in real life? How's your diet? These are all things that will affect your mood. My advice, talk to your Doctor or counselor (you don't have to tell them everything) and try to relax buddy.
Best of luck.
Best of luck.