04-14-2014, 09:43 PM
(This post was last modified: 04-14-2014, 09:45 PM by WalkingonStarlight.)
I'm going to try and make this long story as short as possible. I'm basically wanting to reconnect with an old friend whom I had a misunderstanding with. We used to like each other, he met someone else and I dealt with that and moved on. However we still had a good friendship, but his girlfriend I think felt threatened by me. There was a misunderstanding over Facebook because I wouldn't add her he assumed I thought she was a bad person which wasn't the case. I had never met her and only seen her in passing. I'm a very private person and don't add everybody to my Facebook. Plus regarding her body language it did seem as if she was worried I might 'steal' him or something, there were some glares.
So he blocked me and hasn't talked to me for two years just about. To make it worse I had a friend, who wasn't really a friend. She became very jealous over me, she didn't like to go out with me because she said in an angry outburst one day, ''all the guys will just go for you''. That and she was always putting me down, telling me I would never get anywhere, I was useless, etc.
We were all in this small community, a costume/anime one. She went to his group and spread rumors about me. I know there must be rumors because when I walk into a convention or event, I get stared at like I'm a main attraction and there are giggles, sniggers, and whispering. (This still happens two years later) I attempted to talk to him once, he ran away...she also talks to them a lot now. Yet there are times if we see each other he does look at me with a sad expression and kind of gravitates towards me. So I would assume he may still have a want for the friendship himself. We were friends for three years and I thought he was one of the most genuine friends I really had.
My question is, how can I reconnect with someone in a situation like this? I did value our friendship and he did say he didn't want to have to delete me (I think it was the girlfriend who was fretting). I'm one of those people who if I value you, and we have a fight I will forgive and forget quite easily. Because life is just too short to have grudges or regrets.
My second question is, how can I deal with this emotional bullying? My old friend is quite mainpulative so I don't want to go anywhere near her. I hate the tension when I go into these places, especially since I don't know what has been said about me. Even if I could never be friends with him or some of my old friends again, I would like to at least be friendly and not have this icy atmosphere.
So he blocked me and hasn't talked to me for two years just about. To make it worse I had a friend, who wasn't really a friend. She became very jealous over me, she didn't like to go out with me because she said in an angry outburst one day, ''all the guys will just go for you''. That and she was always putting me down, telling me I would never get anywhere, I was useless, etc.
We were all in this small community, a costume/anime one. She went to his group and spread rumors about me. I know there must be rumors because when I walk into a convention or event, I get stared at like I'm a main attraction and there are giggles, sniggers, and whispering. (This still happens two years later) I attempted to talk to him once, he ran away...she also talks to them a lot now. Yet there are times if we see each other he does look at me with a sad expression and kind of gravitates towards me. So I would assume he may still have a want for the friendship himself. We were friends for three years and I thought he was one of the most genuine friends I really had.
My question is, how can I reconnect with someone in a situation like this? I did value our friendship and he did say he didn't want to have to delete me (I think it was the girlfriend who was fretting). I'm one of those people who if I value you, and we have a fight I will forgive and forget quite easily. Because life is just too short to have grudges or regrets.
My second question is, how can I deal with this emotional bullying? My old friend is quite mainpulative so I don't want to go anywhere near her. I hate the tension when I go into these places, especially since I don't know what has been said about me. Even if I could never be friends with him or some of my old friends again, I would like to at least be friendly and not have this icy atmosphere.