Ex hates me a lot now, not sure what to do.

[Kelse]

So around August of last year I met an Australian named Zach from my town and we fell in love a short while after that, we lasted around 2 months before breaking up and I was left crying in my own arms because no one else I trusted that much to see me cry. Now let me point this out I got in 3 relationships after that but they didn't last anywhere near as long, me and Zach got over it and got back together and we loved more than before, it was a great relationship. We kissed, had sex, and other stuff that lovers would do, but he kept coming back to my place drunk as hell and it made me cry everytime he did but I couldn't give him up until the 5th night in a row he did it I exploded and told him we were breaking up, he went to rehab "for me" but I got together with my other ex, Spencer, and I couldn't risk getting so hurt again and he came home, found out about us, got pissed, told me off, made fun of my dead dad several times and I told him to go drink and get depressed again. Well, today I ran into him, crying my eyes out for him and wrapped my arms around him and kept yelling "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" to him and he just pushed me away and said "What do you want?" I told him that I just wanted one last hug and he said I need to earn it if I'm getting one because he doesn't trust me at all anymore. Now let me say I've always had trust issues and this guy was the only one I've ever trusted other than my dad who has passed like I said. Anyway he gave me my hug and chance but said if I fudged up again it was over...So what do I do?

TL;DR
I got with a guy, we fell in love, we broke up because he drank, he went to rehab, I got with another guy because I didn't want to get hurt, he came back and told me off, left me alone and basically hates me now.