01-30-2012, 06:11 PM
Is it bad that I want to get high???
My dad grows marijuana legally & it pisses me off in a way. At the same time, it's to bring more $$$ into this house. He never is allowed to smoke it because the drug testing that goes on with him.
My mom, the other day she got high while I was spending the night with my GF. FYI, me & my GF live with each other & parents know that have our head untop of our shoulders. On weekdays, were at my family's house then over her family's on the weekends. I mean, we practically <3 each other & it will be hard to sleep alone.
But the bitch about it all is how my GFs in the picture, my mom never talks to me about anything, I always hear stuff from someone else or my GF. That's exactly how I heard about the getting high of my mom.
Not only with all that, I start to get a lot of huge, random paranoia about my GF. Usually when dreams come up but only when there is no dream catcher. I have a dream catcher in my room so I mean, it was the other day I had one. But usually I get these & I feel so into it that it affects me from sleeping at the time once I wake up. I even wake her up for help with the situation & it's all little stuff that hits with no need.
I'm posting this up as a way to get comments from others, I mean, I don't think I would need much help with it all because I know the source of much of my problems. I just want to get it out of me which is a reason why.
Str: He never talks anymore because he's with his GF all the time & is also working to.
Bra: GF hates for reasons that don't even exist. He's a "Stud" that likes to get high & drunk whenever. I'm into that stuff but we do it enough to where it doesn't affect us. He lives with his GF as she has a child & they are always working. He also has his head screwed on in a way.
Z: He left because there was a girl that I liked before but left her for some circumstances that I couldn't stand. I stuck by his side, was his friend but then he left since I screwed things up with her. Like, he never talks to me & even when I tried contacting, he just didn't respond. There were times I would make short conversation & my GF is best friends with him & she tells me I just can't talk like this & that but though she talks almost exactly like I do & he talks to her.
J: He was my best friend, like the only true friend & still is in a way. The sad part is I moved away.
Other small friends are just going through text, never really hung out with them or are other friends, friends.
Even then when my GF has these two best friends (guys), she has many friends around. I feel as if sometimes she is cheating on me at the same time, she really <3s me.
Through all this, I have hit a hear full of anger coming up with this & need help! In a way, thought it would be from here.
My dad grows marijuana legally & it pisses me off in a way. At the same time, it's to bring more $$$ into this house. He never is allowed to smoke it because the drug testing that goes on with him.
My mom, the other day she got high while I was spending the night with my GF. FYI, me & my GF live with each other & parents know that have our head untop of our shoulders. On weekdays, were at my family's house then over her family's on the weekends. I mean, we practically <3 each other & it will be hard to sleep alone.
But the bitch about it all is how my GFs in the picture, my mom never talks to me about anything, I always hear stuff from someone else or my GF. That's exactly how I heard about the getting high of my mom.
Not only with all that, I start to get a lot of huge, random paranoia about my GF. Usually when dreams come up but only when there is no dream catcher. I have a dream catcher in my room so I mean, it was the other day I had one. But usually I get these & I feel so into it that it affects me from sleeping at the time once I wake up. I even wake her up for help with the situation & it's all little stuff that hits with no need.
I'm posting this up as a way to get comments from others, I mean, I don't think I would need much help with it all because I know the source of much of my problems. I just want to get it out of me which is a reason why.
Source of my Problems (I believe)
How my friends are & how many I have. My self-esteem level to be exact. I have a horrible self-esteem I believe because I have no friends. The ones I had ware listed here, will hide most of the name:Str: He never talks anymore because he's with his GF all the time & is also working to.
Bra: GF hates for reasons that don't even exist. He's a "Stud" that likes to get high & drunk whenever. I'm into that stuff but we do it enough to where it doesn't affect us. He lives with his GF as she has a child & they are always working. He also has his head screwed on in a way.
Z: He left because there was a girl that I liked before but left her for some circumstances that I couldn't stand. I stuck by his side, was his friend but then he left since I screwed things up with her. Like, he never talks to me & even when I tried contacting, he just didn't respond. There were times I would make short conversation & my GF is best friends with him & she tells me I just can't talk like this & that but though she talks almost exactly like I do & he talks to her.
J: He was my best friend, like the only true friend & still is in a way. The sad part is I moved away.
Other small friends are just going through text, never really hung out with them or are other friends, friends.
Even then when my GF has these two best friends (guys), she has many friends around. I feel as if sometimes she is cheating on me at the same time, she really <3s me.
Through all this, I have hit a hear full of anger coming up with this & need help! In a way, thought it would be from here.
A developer, thinker & bliss guy that tries his hardest to enjoy life ~~~