01-08-2012, 12:27 PM
Well I portrayed the situation I'm in. We're not talking and it's pretty much me trying to wait for her to crack. I need her to crack for me.
As far as her showing love, she doesn't. But she has before, so she's not like incapable. We've had periods where I felt really close to her and she felt close to me, like we were actually in love, and I'm not sure why it stopped. I know she is reluctant to become "attached" to me because she feels that's how people get hurt, but in reality I wouldn't hurt her like that. I'm too attached to her anyway.
I just really want her to see that I'm just here waiting. But I can't make her come to me or to realize what I'm going through without her. She doesn't even know what I'm doing now. She could assume that I'm out trying to forget about her in the meantime, but I'm not. I'm literally laying here waiting for her. And since she's mad, if I even told her this she wouldn't realize the desperation, she wouldn't even care.
I really want to tell her how I feel, but I'm striking it right now. I've done it in the past and now she probably can't even trust my words anymore, because I say stuff so much. If I go to her, I feel like things won't get fixed. I want to make it so that she realizes the severity of my cause, and comes to me and changes. If I go to her, this will only happen again eventually.
But I do know how she feels. It's not a matter of explaining, I just know that she cares and all. And she has shown it before. I just want that back.
As far as her showing love, she doesn't. But she has before, so she's not like incapable. We've had periods where I felt really close to her and she felt close to me, like we were actually in love, and I'm not sure why it stopped. I know she is reluctant to become "attached" to me because she feels that's how people get hurt, but in reality I wouldn't hurt her like that. I'm too attached to her anyway.
I just really want her to see that I'm just here waiting. But I can't make her come to me or to realize what I'm going through without her. She doesn't even know what I'm doing now. She could assume that I'm out trying to forget about her in the meantime, but I'm not. I'm literally laying here waiting for her. And since she's mad, if I even told her this she wouldn't realize the desperation, she wouldn't even care.
I really want to tell her how I feel, but I'm striking it right now. I've done it in the past and now she probably can't even trust my words anymore, because I say stuff so much. If I go to her, I feel like things won't get fixed. I want to make it so that she realizes the severity of my cause, and comes to me and changes. If I go to her, this will only happen again eventually.
But I do know how she feels. It's not a matter of explaining, I just know that she cares and all. And she has shown it before. I just want that back.