11-05-2009, 11:42 AM
Hey young roy!
Let's TRY!! And get you fixed up a bit, it's going to take time, but i'm pretty sure we can manage it can't we!! Your still very young, so if you don't understand what im trying to say to you then just ask me, and i'll explain it a bit better for ya!
First off, you say you can't hold back the tears... It's fine to cry, i've done it many times before now when i've felt down. I personally do think you need to go and see someone, maybe a doctor or someone which can listen to you and give you better advice than i can. Don't think i'm giving up on you because i'm not, far from it to be honest. I just think if you've got the right people to speak to then maybe things will get sorted out for you alot quicker!!
I've noticed a MASSIVE change in you over the years, maybe it's because you've grown up a bit.. And your not little old roy anymore! Your getting older, and your mindset is changing and your hormoans ect. I'm obviously not female, so things will be alot diffrent for you, but i understand what your going through at school, and feeling down i really do. You shouldn't be ashamed of it.. There is LOTS of people that are going through what your going through right now, so don't ever feel alone! You've got your family to talk to, and if you ever need to speak to me about things you know where i am.. I'll always have time to listen to your problems and that, and infact i'm hoping we can get your head sorted out, even if it's a bit just so you can think abit more clearly in the bad times, I'm not going to say i can fix you over night because i can't, this might take weeks or even months of e-mailing and chatting, but the more you open up, and the more stuff you tell me the easier it is for me to help you, or at least try to.. You need to be honest and open with me about pretty much everything that's getting you down, so we can work on one thing at a time and then hopefully you'll soon start feeling better in yourself.
Cutting yourself isn't a good idea. You'll leave scars on your arm, which you won't want to look at later on in life. And you'll always have them i understand that it seems to take your problems away, but it only does this for a little amount of time. You need to start building up your self confidence again, i know this has been knocked through all the crap you've been through, with your dad, school, bullying ect. But it's nothing that can't be sorted out if you want to sort it bad enough! From what you've said to me, you want to get things sorted.. It's really hard tho, as you won't go to the doctors.. Theres nothing wrong in going to get some help! It WILL make you feel better. You might not be able to see it just yet, but it does help. It helps me out no-end to be honest.
I thought that it would be scary, and they would take the piss out of me for being diffrent to other people... But they didn't they listened to my problems, they didn't judge me and they gave me some tablets, which are now helping me out no end. I still have the occasional down day, but everyone does in life. It soon passes tho which is good. And, i'd put money on it if you actually went to see the doctor, he'd either refer you to a councellor, or he'd give you some other way of dealing with your problems, what i think the trouble is... Is that you've been building these problems up for quite some time, and now it's got too much, and your cracking under the pressure. You say you like to help people.. But, if im honest i think you'd do a better job of helping your friends/others if you sorted yourself out first. Then you'd be able to cope so much easier with all the problems that life gives you. I really do understand your situation, i really do... But you need to help yourself, and take my advice when i give you it. Put it to some good use. I really do need you to be completely open with me tho, i can't stress that enough, because if you don't we will help solve one problem and then 2 will appear, and you'll feel even worse. But one step at a time eh! I'm sure you've got alot of friends at school that you can talk to, maybe get their opinion on alot of things, ways to deal with things ect, everyone deals with stuff in diffrent ways, maybe you need to change the way your dealing with things, or at least change it slightly. But whatever suits you best is the best option i think.
Building up your self confidence is going to be hard, but when you do.. You'll feel so much better. You say your fat??? I mean come on your hardly fat now are you!!! And if you say you are your getting a slap! You shouldn't care what people think about you, i personally think your brilliant. You don't need to change for people, and the people who are picking on you are only jealous because you have a better personality than them, and they don't like it.. You must make them feel insecure about something, as they're targeting you for some reason, as of which im not 100% sure about. I do think you should enlighten your mum or clare about your problems, as they can keep a closer eye on you than i can, and maybe they can help you better than me i don't know, but whichever your comfortable with there is no pressure. If you don't want to tell them then that's your choice. I won't tell them unless it's something extremely serious, ie: you commiting suicide or running away or something along them kind of lines.
You need to really need to stop thinking about what other people have, or want.. You need to focus on yourself for a while, your life.. It's going to be changing alot in the next couple of years, so it's going to be a bumpy ride.. Figure out what you want to do in life.. And work hard for it! Like i've told you before, nothing in life is impossible. If you want it bad enough, and you try hard enough to get it then you'll soon get it i'm sure. Life is extremely hard, and it's going to get harder.. Hence why you need to get your confidence built up a bit, and bring the old roy back out again.. The bubbly outgoing roy i knew before, It will take time, and it will be hard.. But you can manage it i'm sure of that!
I am very touched, that you've come to me for help.. I'll help you all i can, but you do need to help yourself aswell your going to need to want the help, as if you don't it won't help you at all. If you just close up then it wont help you, just be as honest as possible with me, i won't judge you nor will i take the piss. Whatever you say to me stays with me. When you tell me stuff, think of me as some random person in japan that doesn't know you, think of it as tho your getting it off your chest, and once you've said it try and forget about that problem, or think of ways on how you can fix it.
Watch this video, it's 25 tips on building self confidence, i'm serious about this, follow some of the steps on the video for around 3weeks, and you should start feeling a bit better.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s2KFuXPKd94
Maybe it will help you, maybe it won't, but your not losing anything by trying it, your only going be making yourself better and more confident.
Anyways, i'm going to head off to bed now, have a read of this, watch the video.. And we will see how you get on from there, if you still don't feel any better explain to me how you feel, and i'll try and find other videos to help you out a bit.
Keep your chin up!! Remember, your you for a reason, and it's a good reason.. Don't let anyone tell you any diffrent.
Also, remember if you ever need me, you know where i live.. Or you can contact me on msn if your too scared to knock and i'll come out the back to talk to you, or we can talk on msn whichever you feel more comfortable with.
Carl xxx
^^ I sent her that in a e-mail, do you think that maybe will help her a bit? Also, is there any other things people think i should add to it.
Let's TRY!! And get you fixed up a bit, it's going to take time, but i'm pretty sure we can manage it can't we!! Your still very young, so if you don't understand what im trying to say to you then just ask me, and i'll explain it a bit better for ya!
First off, you say you can't hold back the tears... It's fine to cry, i've done it many times before now when i've felt down. I personally do think you need to go and see someone, maybe a doctor or someone which can listen to you and give you better advice than i can. Don't think i'm giving up on you because i'm not, far from it to be honest. I just think if you've got the right people to speak to then maybe things will get sorted out for you alot quicker!!
I've noticed a MASSIVE change in you over the years, maybe it's because you've grown up a bit.. And your not little old roy anymore! Your getting older, and your mindset is changing and your hormoans ect. I'm obviously not female, so things will be alot diffrent for you, but i understand what your going through at school, and feeling down i really do. You shouldn't be ashamed of it.. There is LOTS of people that are going through what your going through right now, so don't ever feel alone! You've got your family to talk to, and if you ever need to speak to me about things you know where i am.. I'll always have time to listen to your problems and that, and infact i'm hoping we can get your head sorted out, even if it's a bit just so you can think abit more clearly in the bad times, I'm not going to say i can fix you over night because i can't, this might take weeks or even months of e-mailing and chatting, but the more you open up, and the more stuff you tell me the easier it is for me to help you, or at least try to.. You need to be honest and open with me about pretty much everything that's getting you down, so we can work on one thing at a time and then hopefully you'll soon start feeling better in yourself.
Cutting yourself isn't a good idea. You'll leave scars on your arm, which you won't want to look at later on in life. And you'll always have them i understand that it seems to take your problems away, but it only does this for a little amount of time. You need to start building up your self confidence again, i know this has been knocked through all the crap you've been through, with your dad, school, bullying ect. But it's nothing that can't be sorted out if you want to sort it bad enough! From what you've said to me, you want to get things sorted.. It's really hard tho, as you won't go to the doctors.. Theres nothing wrong in going to get some help! It WILL make you feel better. You might not be able to see it just yet, but it does help. It helps me out no-end to be honest.
I thought that it would be scary, and they would take the piss out of me for being diffrent to other people... But they didn't they listened to my problems, they didn't judge me and they gave me some tablets, which are now helping me out no end. I still have the occasional down day, but everyone does in life. It soon passes tho which is good. And, i'd put money on it if you actually went to see the doctor, he'd either refer you to a councellor, or he'd give you some other way of dealing with your problems, what i think the trouble is... Is that you've been building these problems up for quite some time, and now it's got too much, and your cracking under the pressure. You say you like to help people.. But, if im honest i think you'd do a better job of helping your friends/others if you sorted yourself out first. Then you'd be able to cope so much easier with all the problems that life gives you. I really do understand your situation, i really do... But you need to help yourself, and take my advice when i give you it. Put it to some good use. I really do need you to be completely open with me tho, i can't stress that enough, because if you don't we will help solve one problem and then 2 will appear, and you'll feel even worse. But one step at a time eh! I'm sure you've got alot of friends at school that you can talk to, maybe get their opinion on alot of things, ways to deal with things ect, everyone deals with stuff in diffrent ways, maybe you need to change the way your dealing with things, or at least change it slightly. But whatever suits you best is the best option i think.
Building up your self confidence is going to be hard, but when you do.. You'll feel so much better. You say your fat??? I mean come on your hardly fat now are you!!! And if you say you are your getting a slap! You shouldn't care what people think about you, i personally think your brilliant. You don't need to change for people, and the people who are picking on you are only jealous because you have a better personality than them, and they don't like it.. You must make them feel insecure about something, as they're targeting you for some reason, as of which im not 100% sure about. I do think you should enlighten your mum or clare about your problems, as they can keep a closer eye on you than i can, and maybe they can help you better than me i don't know, but whichever your comfortable with there is no pressure. If you don't want to tell them then that's your choice. I won't tell them unless it's something extremely serious, ie: you commiting suicide or running away or something along them kind of lines.
You need to really need to stop thinking about what other people have, or want.. You need to focus on yourself for a while, your life.. It's going to be changing alot in the next couple of years, so it's going to be a bumpy ride.. Figure out what you want to do in life.. And work hard for it! Like i've told you before, nothing in life is impossible. If you want it bad enough, and you try hard enough to get it then you'll soon get it i'm sure. Life is extremely hard, and it's going to get harder.. Hence why you need to get your confidence built up a bit, and bring the old roy back out again.. The bubbly outgoing roy i knew before, It will take time, and it will be hard.. But you can manage it i'm sure of that!
I am very touched, that you've come to me for help.. I'll help you all i can, but you do need to help yourself aswell your going to need to want the help, as if you don't it won't help you at all. If you just close up then it wont help you, just be as honest as possible with me, i won't judge you nor will i take the piss. Whatever you say to me stays with me. When you tell me stuff, think of me as some random person in japan that doesn't know you, think of it as tho your getting it off your chest, and once you've said it try and forget about that problem, or think of ways on how you can fix it.
Watch this video, it's 25 tips on building self confidence, i'm serious about this, follow some of the steps on the video for around 3weeks, and you should start feeling a bit better.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s2KFuXPKd94
Maybe it will help you, maybe it won't, but your not losing anything by trying it, your only going be making yourself better and more confident.
Anyways, i'm going to head off to bed now, have a read of this, watch the video.. And we will see how you get on from there, if you still don't feel any better explain to me how you feel, and i'll try and find other videos to help you out a bit.
Keep your chin up!! Remember, your you for a reason, and it's a good reason.. Don't let anyone tell you any diffrent.
Also, remember if you ever need me, you know where i live.. Or you can contact me on msn if your too scared to knock and i'll come out the back to talk to you, or we can talk on msn whichever you feel more comfortable with.
Carl xxx
^^ I sent her that in a e-mail, do you think that maybe will help her a bit? Also, is there any other things people think i should add to it.
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