06-29-2011, 11:24 AM
(This post was last modified: 06-29-2011, 12:24 PM by PoisoNinja.)
It all starts about 2 years ago, I was 17 and living in Texas. I was a junior in high school, had a lot of friends, I didn't think about the consequences of my actions.. My friends and I partied a lot and that was only the beginning... Needless to say, I got into drugs and alcohol, crap got crazy, I wasn't getting along with my mom or stepdad, I ended up dropping out of school (it was that or be expelled) and I basically lived at friends houses for the next 3 weeks until I decided to move to Indiana with my dad..
All of my friends wanted me to stay, some even offering to let me live with them, but I felt it was time to get away for a bit, to clear my head, and get my crap together..
Present Day: I'm still living in Indiana, I started going to a local community college last fall (currently out for summer), still don't have a job, have no friends, and I still have no direction..
This where it all gets weird though, about a month ago, I started talking to my mom about me going back out there, she was all excited about it... My dad got home that day, and was like "Well, I have some work for you, that could end up permanent if you do good..." (He's a painter btw) So I was just like "Alright, hell yeah" almost a month a half later, there's been only a few words said about it... And my mom is trying everything she possibly can to get me back out there, her and my stepdad have even lined up a job for me.... And I'm just stuck and don't know what to do; should I try to go back, or should I just push through here?? I enjoy living with my dad, but really don't enjoy my stepmom and her 5 kids.... I mean I smoke weed and I don't even buy my own crap, because it's already here... I'm just turning into even more of a mooch-bum than before and I can just feel it.. And for those that say to just stop smoking, if I say no to a joint that their trying to pass me, that don't turn out well...trust me, they think I have a chip on my shoulder then.. I just don't know what to do, I could be on my way to Texas tomorrow if I wanted, and to be honest that is what I want, but I just don't want to let my dad down, I just feel that he would be disappointed if I left, but then again, I'm now 19, I can't be chilling here forever...
I know that's not the prettiest post (or life, in that matter), but I just got it out in a way that others would hopefully be able to understand where I'm coming from..
P.S. I know I skipped the introduction, but I'll get to it ;P
All of my friends wanted me to stay, some even offering to let me live with them, but I felt it was time to get away for a bit, to clear my head, and get my crap together..
Present Day: I'm still living in Indiana, I started going to a local community college last fall (currently out for summer), still don't have a job, have no friends, and I still have no direction..
This where it all gets weird though, about a month ago, I started talking to my mom about me going back out there, she was all excited about it... My dad got home that day, and was like "Well, I have some work for you, that could end up permanent if you do good..." (He's a painter btw) So I was just like "Alright, hell yeah" almost a month a half later, there's been only a few words said about it... And my mom is trying everything she possibly can to get me back out there, her and my stepdad have even lined up a job for me.... And I'm just stuck and don't know what to do; should I try to go back, or should I just push through here?? I enjoy living with my dad, but really don't enjoy my stepmom and her 5 kids.... I mean I smoke weed and I don't even buy my own crap, because it's already here... I'm just turning into even more of a mooch-bum than before and I can just feel it.. And for those that say to just stop smoking, if I say no to a joint that their trying to pass me, that don't turn out well...trust me, they think I have a chip on my shoulder then.. I just don't know what to do, I could be on my way to Texas tomorrow if I wanted, and to be honest that is what I want, but I just don't want to let my dad down, I just feel that he would be disappointed if I left, but then again, I'm now 19, I can't be chilling here forever...
I know that's not the prettiest post (or life, in that matter), but I just got it out in a way that others would hopefully be able to understand where I'm coming from..
P.S. I know I skipped the introduction, but I'll get to it ;P