Today wasn't one of the best days i've had

[Metapod]

Yeah.. It's a real kick in the a** lol. I know i'll live no matter what the outcome is, it's just hard to get through the tougher times. The more you love the person too, the harder it seems to be apparently. The thing that i've always noticed, is that it takes you a while to realise that the good thing has ended. One the day of the breakup it's like you don't feel a thing, and you think you can accept it, but the day after it hits you in the face and your true emotions come out lol. I'm just going to wake up tomorrow and my goal is to figure out how to get through the day.

Today was pretty bad, it was going smooth until around lunchtime when I got the bad news. The sun was even out lol. Then it was almost like half an hour after I got dumped that the weather went to crap. The clouds turned grey and it started to hail even. Ironic symolism isn't it? haha. I probably would have never paid as much attention if it wasn't a day like this though.

You tend to notice a lot more when you're in a depressed state. Even the littlest things can become amusing. I still have strong feelings for her, but what makes it even worse is that I know there are 2 other guys that are interested in her. She doesn't know though because she used to spend more time with me instead. I would hate to see one of them try their luck at her within the first week though. That would really make things worse.

You know how it is though, human nature. You still will feel a connection with the person you love even though that symbolic bond is broken between having a relationship.

One thing that i'm thinking about now is whether or not I should be going back for her or not. I'm a tough guy, I can ride it out until my mental state heals, with time as my doctor, but that's going to be the biggest barrier to break. I'll have to come to a fork in the road with 2 paths soon to make my decision. But that will probably be by the end of this week.

She told me that she really felt that it would work in the beginning as well when she broke up with me. So how could something change so quickly? If I can learn from any mistake that i've made at least I could benefit from that and grow stronger. I have no idea what that means, but it's difficult to talk to her about it so soon after this event. There's usually an awkward distance between the 2 people for a while anyways.

I really think it's between us though, how this story will go. We, will have to figure that out..

Dude i believe everything happens for a reason.Im glad to see you keeping your head up and staying positive.This girl doesnt know what she lost.

Things can go two ways though as well. I know she was a great person, i've had tons and tons of compliments on how good of a "catch" I had lol. I guess that's not really helping me though. I like the sympathy, but comments like that do not help me at all with my mental rehabilitation haha. I do know very well what I lost for now though, I've had lots of experiences in life, but this was a unique one for me. Even if she wasn't the one for me, she's an amazing person. I even let her know that today.

Staying positive is key, whether I get another second chance by luck, or my time has ended to start anew. Time keeps ticking though, so it'll unravel itself at some point in time for my future. When you get going in a different direction then planned for your visioned future though, it confuses the hell out of you lol.

From what I've seen around the forums of you, I think you'll do fine.

Just don't do what I did and be rude to her after... I know what you mean about the first day, then the next day I was angry and it didn't end out to well...

I would wait for a bit, if you still have those strong feelings then you go after her. It's been a year and a half, I still have those feelings and I'm making my move in the next few days when she moves back to Cali. Whatever you choose though, I wish you luck.