New story I'm writing

[Psychosis]

The wording could definitely be better. You missed a few commas, and added a few where they didn't need to be. You also had some other grammatical errors. Sounds like a good story though. Never use numbers. Always type it out, unless it is a date of course. When you write how you did the story could be over in a few pages. You need to expand more on the main character. His experiences in the lab. How they trained him. How did the war start? Stuff like that. If you ever need an editor I'm here. ^_^

alright man sounds good, i just do it for fun so i share like all of the stuff i write dont expect to make money doing it thats what my computers for.