If she is still rehabilitational, then I think the only way to mend her apparent ‘vegetable’ mind might be to force her into accepting the reality of her trauma: that her son killed himself, and she found a way to divert that emotional pain by characterizing the personality traits of a ‘vegetable’ she isn’t. Maybe she feels guilty because, to an extent, she might have known of her son’s intention to kill himself or of his emotional distress leading up to it, but due to her failure to act or intervene, she now subconciously holds herself responsible and chooses to never acknowledge the extent of what she feels responsible for.
Guilt and hurt are maybe what cause her to invent a secondary persona - one in which she is too physically and mentally challenged to be held responsible for the trauma she experienced.
Your situation reminds me a little of the movie Shutter Island, where a mental patient is actually given his secondary persona ‘role’ to ‘play’ until the doctors of the institution decide his mind is into the role far enough for them to provide evidence of the harsh truth he denies, thus causing him to accept the concious reality he has created for himself due to his trauma.
I do believe that we (as humans) need to often rehearse emotions we might not otherwise enjoy rehearsing, as to occassionally remind us of who we really are. The same reason we pay to watch a sad movie... we don’t like being sad, but we’ll pay to watch one because we like to rehearse those emotions every so often. It reminds us of who we really are beneath our forever changable exterior.
I’ve never studied psychiatry, and I’m pretty much basing my entire theory on the lesson I believe I learned from a very well written movie, but I honestly believe that maybe it would be worth sitting her down and providing a forceful reminder of the truth with tangible evidence she can’t deny. It probably sounds fudged up, but pictures of his life (to prove and remind her of his existence), pictures of his death (if they can be obtained), and a concise yet direct statement from you referencing the specifics of the scene might be enough for your grandmother to accept what happened and remember the past. Emphasize with her that she is not responsible for what happened, and that you understand the reasons why she portrays herself the way she does now. However, if she continues living this second persona life, she’s ultimately destroying what little family she has left, further meaning her son died for nothing.
A ‘vegetable’ with memory loss wouldn’t be able to contemplate evidence you provide anyway, let alone understand it. So if she really is forever broken, I can’t see how you will be doing her any mental harm trying. If she shows ANY emotional distress from what she sees, then you know she isn’t a complete ‘vegetable’ and that she remembers what she pretends she doesn't. So push harder with the truth until the reality she’s denied for so long surfaces emotionally.
Again, this is all just a theory. Assuming your grandmother’s mind is still rehabilitational, I’d advise seeking help from a qualified psychiatrist before even considering acting on anything I’ve just typed. I do wish you the best of luck though, and hope that maybe my theory has been of some guidance towards a method that might work...
Guilt and hurt are maybe what cause her to invent a secondary persona - one in which she is too physically and mentally challenged to be held responsible for the trauma she experienced.
Your situation reminds me a little of the movie Shutter Island, where a mental patient is actually given his secondary persona ‘role’ to ‘play’ until the doctors of the institution decide his mind is into the role far enough for them to provide evidence of the harsh truth he denies, thus causing him to accept the concious reality he has created for himself due to his trauma.
I do believe that we (as humans) need to often rehearse emotions we might not otherwise enjoy rehearsing, as to occassionally remind us of who we really are. The same reason we pay to watch a sad movie... we don’t like being sad, but we’ll pay to watch one because we like to rehearse those emotions every so often. It reminds us of who we really are beneath our forever changable exterior.
I’ve never studied psychiatry, and I’m pretty much basing my entire theory on the lesson I believe I learned from a very well written movie, but I honestly believe that maybe it would be worth sitting her down and providing a forceful reminder of the truth with tangible evidence she can’t deny. It probably sounds fudged up, but pictures of his life (to prove and remind her of his existence), pictures of his death (if they can be obtained), and a concise yet direct statement from you referencing the specifics of the scene might be enough for your grandmother to accept what happened and remember the past. Emphasize with her that she is not responsible for what happened, and that you understand the reasons why she portrays herself the way she does now. However, if she continues living this second persona life, she’s ultimately destroying what little family she has left, further meaning her son died for nothing.
A ‘vegetable’ with memory loss wouldn’t be able to contemplate evidence you provide anyway, let alone understand it. So if she really is forever broken, I can’t see how you will be doing her any mental harm trying. If she shows ANY emotional distress from what she sees, then you know she isn’t a complete ‘vegetable’ and that she remembers what she pretends she doesn't. So push harder with the truth until the reality she’s denied for so long surfaces emotionally.
Again, this is all just a theory. Assuming your grandmother’s mind is still rehabilitational, I’d advise seeking help from a qualified psychiatrist before even considering acting on anything I’ve just typed. I do wish you the best of luck though, and hope that maybe my theory has been of some guidance towards a method that might work...