crap, what to do with my life?

[Gerira]

Hi there, it's me again. Lately I've been trying to quit smoking, but after a day or two I always relapsed. At the moment, I'm trying to quit. It's my 500th attempt lol. I feel so bored, and without smoking I probably wouldn't have a reason to get out from the house except for Saturday nights. I feel like everyone runs a more normal, calmer life than I do. I'm always nervous, in a rush. Talking dumb crap, making people laugh. I just feel like a clown. I want to be a bit more mature, more responsible. I'm tired of being a "clown" and a general screw-up. Most of the people don't even know that I have mostly B's and A's in school due to the fact that I act like a moron in the real world. Most of the time I get a question like "Hey, you passed this year or what?"... and things like that. Also, I have problems with girls. At first, they seem to like me, but more they get to know me, the more they try to avoid me. So, to almost every girl I try to hit on, I get rejected. It's frustrating. Also, I don't even know how to be emotional and sensitive to people. Maybe it's due to the fact that I grew up in a family that's in a fudged up state or idk. It seems like most of the people have something to do when they're home, like helping out their dad or going to some sport. Most of them commited to something. I commited to nothing. My life is usually waking up, going to buy a pack of ciggs, smoking and riding my bike around the town for an hour or two, sleeping, going to "play" soccer (smoking again and just talking with ppl), going for a beer/sandwich in the town, going to sleep.

I want something new in my life, ffs I would really love to go on a vacation. Haven't been on one for 4 years already. Most of the people I know are on the vacation, I feel like I'm the only one rotting here on +30°C in a small continental town :S. Also, I want to find a way to relax and how to cope with anxiety and depression that kicks in every now and then. But I can't, I feel like getting drunk and smoking one/two packs of ciggs a day only works for me. Please help me out, I really need an advice. I tried to sign up for a sport, but due to some stuff that happened recently, I can't go there :/.

[Caffeine]

How old are you? Have you ever thought about going into the military?

You could always do something like the national guard... It's not as big of a commitment as going into the ARMY or Navy.

Just a thought.

[Pass Candy]

To cope with depression just chill with your friends, listen to some music and play console, bro try that it might help.

[Gerira]

How old are you? Have you ever thought about going into the military?

You could always do something like the national guard... It's not as big of a commitment as going into the ARMY or Navy.

Just a thought.

I can't go to the army and be a soldier due to some health reasons, but I'm planning to go to college and apply for this millitary scholarship, where they pay you for your schooling and they provide you a place to sleep and all. After that, you have a guaranteed job in the army, you can be a soldier or do some desk work or something. I think that during the college you have to go through training like a normal soldier would do.

To cope with depression just chill with your friends, listen to some music and play console, bro try that it might help.

I'm not depressed really, more worried or something like that.

[Nov]

Sup man? I have been trying to quit smoking as well recently. I stopped a few days ago but as song as I met a few friends yesterday I started smoking again. When I went home I was able to stop again. Now, today is a new day and I plan to stay off them for good.

I heard a good tip yesterday for people who are trying to quit. Whenever you get a craving to smoke, just think of it this way, you relieve your craving when you have a cigarette and feel calm and relaxed again. A non-smoker feels like this most of time without having to put a stick of tobacco in their mouths and inhaling chemicals which are just killing you.

[BreShiE]

Smoking is the most addicting drug in the whole world, it's more powerful then cocaine, so it's going to be hard. Which country are you from? Then I may be able to suggest some things for you.

[Gerira]

Smoking is the most addicting drug in the whole world, it's more powerful then cocaine, so it's going to be hard. Which country are you from? Then I may be able to suggest some things for you.

I'm from Croatia...