Is my girlfriend depressed? Or is she just sick of me...

[anonymousman]

Hello, I'm just going to start with some background information, and everything that's going on at the moment.

When my relationship started with my girlfriend everything was going amazing. Most relationships start off like a rocket I think. She was once a really happy and active person to talk to. She would always use smiley faces in her texts and talk creatively to me.

She doesn't really have any serious interests or hobbies, and I was sorta wondering if that had something to do with her depression, but now I'll give you some insight on what's happening at the moment.

One day at college, she was acting really blank, and oblivious to the world, and wasn't making any eye contact with me. I could tell something was on her mind, I asked her what was up. But she just replied with: "Nothing." and gave me a fake, hopeless smile.

I text her when I got home from college, the usual start to a conversation: "Hey babe, how are you? Wuu2? xxxxxxx" etc. And she didn't seem to be up to talking, she wasn't very happy at all shall we say. So I asked her if anything was up earlier, and that she seemed depressed. She told me she had always been depressed, and I asked why and I still ask her why today and she never tells me anything. She says that talking about it will only make her more depressed.

Now, on the way into college she hardly utters a word to me, like the conversation is completely dry for her. I am a really talkative person, but today I just didn't say anything to her, like to see what would happen, and we walked all the way into college, through a 10 minute walk without uttering a word to each other.

It was really awkward, but this is where the confusion begins for me, and it has been like ever since she was depressed. When we got into college, she strikes up fine conversations with everyone else! All my friends, other people in the class, she can talk absaloutely fine with them! So why not with me? It really started to puzzle me because, I stick by her side and try to cheer her up everyday, strike up a good conversation with her and catch her in a happy mood and keep it there, sometimes I have accomplished doing that. But I can't help but wonder, if she's just lost interest in me all-together.

So what is your opinion on this? What should I do? I love her so much, and I want to be with her, but her depression is starting to bring me down, and I'm never normally depressed. I definitely want to stay with her, but this "depression" of hers needs to be solved now.

Whilst I'm trying to help her depression, I also have the feeling in the back of my mind that she might have just lost interest in me and doesn't want to talk to me. But then I also have the feeling, that she might just be putting on a brave face to everyone else, and feel depressed around me because she knows that she can.

Please give your thoughts guys, it would be much appreciated.

Thanks. :/

[Confusedhatter]

It could very well be her depression, there isn't a whole lot you can do for that but avoid the "Get over it" attitude.

Try to get her to see a professional, depression can be a chemical issue that a few meds could help.

-CFH

[SleepyTroll]

If she is that depressed what she is doing with her friends and classmates is showing them her mask. You saw her mask at first that's who was sending all the smiley faces etc. You need to keep asking her whats wrong and get her to talk about it and that you'll be there for her through it. She's just being herself around you. It is your job as her boyfriend to help her out of that depression. It may be hard at first but be persistent.

[J4M35]

I think you should sit down with her and have a long talk and try to get her to tell her whats wrong. Maybe you should go see a phsycatrist with her to try and figure this out.

[AceInfinity]

What you need to do is to let her know that you are there for her. To say that when and if she needs to talk about anything, that you DO care, because it hurts you seeing her like that. You can't force her to talk to you about it though, so what you need to do is to be completely upfront and open with her, and to tell her the way you feel. Obviously you don't like seeing her like that, and the only person that needs to know that is her. Communication is key in any relationship, and don't assume things to potentially break anything that isn't broken between your bond with her. People are too curious, and it's usually assumptions that break a couple apart more than anything. If she's ready, she will talk to you about it, but all you need to do as i've said, is to let her know that it upsets you to see her like that, and if she needs to talk that you hope she knows that you are there for her whenever.

If you get too pushy that may frustrate her, it's just how women are. People usually don't like others getting into their personal business trying to solve things for them, so the best you can do right now is to just show that you care, which should be enough to help her get through it and if she gains confidence enough to ask you about anything or tell you about it, then she will.

[BlackChaos]

What you need to do is to let her know that you are there for her. To say that when and...

This post is from May 2011 my friend. It was bumped up by the above located spammer.

[AceInfinity]

This post is from May 2011 my friend. It was bumped up by the above located spammer.

Oh well, that's the beauty of all forums sometimes lol One spammer has to ruin it all. I don't care though, my post is valid for most things in a relationship, so maybe it will help someone else out too

[King]

Howdy,

It sounds to me like she's definitely going through something. She also wants to tell you what's wrong. It may be relative to your relationship, given the way she's conversing with everyone else. It may not. I think the reason why she's fine with everyone else and not you is because she's looking for you to feel guilty and ask what's wrong. Why she's not responding is because you're not trying hard enough.

You need to sit her down and tell her how much you love her and that you need to know what it is that's bothering her. Tell her it's bringing you down and that you don't want to see her like this any more. She will spill.

Edit: Well that was a waste of time.