Lost my mom..

[Sin]

So last year , I lost my mom to cancer it was very emotional for me as she was the only woman that ment the world to me and I did look up to her I struglle everyday knowing she isn't here anymore to say goodnight to or to tell me to get off the xbox because I'm making noise , or to see me grow up and drive , to see me turn 18 , to see me get married and most importantly she will never see my children "/

These are the thoughts I cope with everyday and It makes me feel empty.

[Shock]

Oh now I see why you made that comment...

Well a few years ago me and my mom lost a very close friend to a drunk driving accident.

We have this country club about 10 miles away from town and he was practically an owner.

He did everything for this club and he had helped us remodel our house in 2001 when we moved in and had helped us up until this day.

Well the story:

He had been at the club drinking as usual.
He was heading towards our house to say a surprise hello but I guess someone had pissed him off before he left.
He was driving (mind that he has never gotten a speeding ticket in his life) and went around a corner (driving his car) and it caught the grass and then slid into the ditch and flipped 12 times throwing him outside right beside the window.
They believe he died on impact but right after it flipped the gas leak caught fire and it blew up. There was nothing left when it all got cleaned up.

We miss him dearly and the road had just been paved the week before this happened so there is a permanent mark in that and the fence up on the bank.

A cross is placed there and has got mown over by a bush hog twice because the grass grows tall.

This guy was practically a father to me since my dad and mom never got married and he beat her when she was pregnant with me.

But anyways we never stop thinking about him and it will be 4 years in June or July.

I hope you have good luck with your coping.

Have you thought about a therapist?

Maybe just a person to talk to.

Good Luck man. I know how hard it can be...

[Sin]

I'm sorry about your loss shock , and I can't afford therapy I don't speak to my dad and I live on my own and right now I'm close to being evicted so money is tight.

[Shock]

I'm sorry about your loss shock , and I can't afford therapy I don't speak to my dad and I live on my own and right now I'm close to being evicted so money is tight.

How old are you and what about education??

[Sin]

I'm 17 and I left college to get a job.

[Baked]

I don't know what I'd do if I lost my Mom, my condolences Sin.

Cancer is a hard thing to lose a loved one to, but a parent. My dad is pretty old and I'm afraid that he won't get to meet my family or even sit in my wedding, he is always working and a man his age shouldn't be doing that.

His family has a horrible history for cancer, I'm just as afraid for him to go to the doctor as he is.
I don't know what I'd do if I had to live at 17 without parents telling me when to go to bed or when supper is.

I truly feel sorry for you Sin, no one your age deserves that.

[Sin]

Thanks baked , It's hard bro everyday I sit here and think why did it have to happen.

[Baked]

You must be a strong willed kid though man, I could do it. It's just I couldn't cope with it as well as you seem to be.

Sometimes you just have to let it out man, you need someone to talk to and vent to.

[Repuhlsive]

You must be a really strong person in general.

I'm sure you will be able to deal with your loss. Just find someone close to you, and let them know what happened, and how you feel. Keeping these things bottled up isn't good.

[windows 7 was my idea]

sorry to hear that mate just be strong