Help me live my life

[Solidify]

Oddly enough, this is perhaps the biggest obstacle I need to overcome to live a happy life and posting about it hadn't yet occurred until last night.

The problem is as follows. I've been allergic to peanuts since birth, which is a common allergy, only making matters worse, considering I'm not alone but yet the only one with this anaphylaxis related issue. I'm proud to say that it's gotten a little bit better since I was a child but the problem is still there and bugs me. It restrains me from living my life and doing things that I've always longed to do.

Allow me to explain.

In order to understand my situation, you need to understand what happens when I come into contact with my allergen. In lamens terms, someone that is allergic to peanuts, as myself, has a body that cannot take it. Having said that, if I eat a peanuts, my body contracts and tightens my respiratory airways. In other words, it means my tongue will swell up and my throat will tighten, running the risk of death by suffocation.

There exists a temporary relief medication called an Epipen that contains medicine that must be injection into my body to counter-act the shock. Even after I've injected myself with the medicinal needle, I still need to be rushed to a hospital as it is only temporary delay to the shock.

To make a long story short, I might have over-sold it. It's not as complicated as I made it out to be. Actually, a lot of people have this allergy. My problem is that I'm really scared of it. I don't know why, when or how I began to feel to frightened, because I know when I was much younger I wasn't. All I know is that it's the reason I turn down offers to go out with friends sometimes as well as date girls.

This might sounds crazy but every time I'm asked to do something (party, movies, clubbing, etc.), I have this obsessive compulsion to automatically process if there will be a point in time throughout the course of the event that I may be in contact with peanuts. For instance, when I'm at the movies, people sitting near me will be eating M&M's and I'll smell the peanuts and just freak out and leave. If a friend at school is eating a peanut butter sandwich, I'll leave and spend 20 minutes in the washroom until I've given her enough time to finish it. Of course, I won't admit to it.

It's ruining my life slowly and I can't move forward unless I learn to put this fear behind me. I've already tried speaking to my older sister about it, which was incredibly hard for some reason. By the way, she has the same allergy, which helped analyze the situation. Either way, she told me that if I smell it, and feel bad, it's all psychological because you can't get sick from smelling it, only by eating it. And as much as I know she's right, because I've been in situations where I was sitting near someone on the bus and not even realize they were eating a candy-bar until I turn to see it and then suddenly freak out, I can't get it out of my head.

Often times, I've considered speaking to a doctor that specializes in food allergies just for extra comforting. Just for them to tell me for sure that nothing can happen from smelling it. Maybe doing that will help. But I'm not sure.

If I can overcome this problem, words can't describe how happy I'd be. The joy of not having to worry about taking a trip, getting a girlfriend and going out on weekends.

Any advice is appreciated.

[Corpse]

So your saying you have developed this sort of phobia with peanuts because of your condition? Either way the only way to cope with a phobia that threatens you in everyday life is to actually get use to the fact that, yes it will always be there. Not to be mean at all, but this whole situation seems a bit odd then again there are alot of odd phobias. I would say just slowly continue to place yourself into environments where you know there will be peanuts and get use to it. Tell yourself that unless they are ingested, you are fine.

[Solidify]

Tell yourself that unless they are ingested, you are fine.

But my mind is too powerful. When I smell peanuts, I feel sick to my stomach.

[Techie©]

solidify,
woud recommend going to the GP and asking to be refered to the nearest specialist clinic for allergies-assuming there was one local.
have seen tv programmes before,based in the UK where they showed how gradually they cured nut allergy in the people that came to the clinic-
unfortunately cannot remember which hospital it was but they shoud have these specialists in all major hospitals as it is a big issue but a common one.
research it locally if have never done so before.

am not allergic to nuts,but can relate due to having profound sensitivity to noise and a higher hearing level than the norm,have got severe anxiety which can start up just by thinking about whether theres going to be a noise-more so in unpredictible places or with unpredictible people.

its because of the hurt and distress that the allergy been triggered causes that have probably developed the automatic fear response,and in own case it works the same with noise.

the response needs desensitizing but woud be better off speaking to a specialist about it and getting their input and support instead of doing this largely by self.

[Solidify]

solidify,
woud recommend going to the GP and asking to be refered to the nearest specialist clinic for allergies-assuming there was one local.
have seen tv programmes before,based in the UK where they showed how gradually they cured nut allergy in the people that came to the clinic-
unfortunately cannot remember which hospital it was but they shoud have these specialists in all major hospitals as it is a big issue but a common one.
research it locally if have never done so before.

am not allergic to nuts,but can relate due to having profound sensitivity to noise and a higher hearing level than the norm,have got severe anxiety which can start up just by thinking about whether theres going to be a noise-more so in unpredictible places or with unpredictible people.

its because of the hurt and distress that the allergy been triggered causes that have probably developed the automatic fear response,and in own case it works the same with noise.

the response needs desensitizing but woud be better off speaking to a specialist about it and getting their input and support instead of doing this largely by self.

What's a GP?

[Corpse]

What's a GP?

Im pretty sure it is a general practitioner.

[Solidify]

I've taken action. I went to see a psychology teacher at my school and she explaining me some breathing and muscle relaxation exercises. She says I'm going to need to practice managing my anxiety and go through systematic desensitization.

[monique12345]

Hi Solidify,
I empathise with your situation. Your teacher is right, you will need to go throough systemetic desensitization. This process varies in time, depending on how serious the phobia is. By the sounds of it, yours sounds very bad and as it developed over time, it will take time to minimise the issues. I am unsure which country you are in, though there are allergy desensitization shots one can take for various allergies. This maybe something you can research with an allergy specialist if you have not done so already. From what I read, it sounds as though you are incredibly anxious and are even afriad of seeing a doctor. this shows me that you already think something bad will happen to you before knowing it actually will. What you have been through is traumatic and phobia is psychological. Good news is it can be treated. You make the first step by asking for help. The bets help you will get in practice is through you doctor who can refer you to a specialist if it works that way where you are. Next step is truely committing to a program to reverse the fear. You obviously want to face them and you may as well just start now. it takes guts to say you have had enough, you want to live and for me you are already half way there. Find inner strength, focus on positive things and things that make you feel good when you start to get anxious and take control of your emotions that are connected to peanuts. You can do this. Just believe. I be happy to support anyway i can, just PM me. Take care

[Solidify]

I am unsure which country you are in

Canada

there are allergy desensitization shots one can take for various allergies

I'm not familiar with these shots. Can you tell me more?

it sounds as though you are incredibly anxious and are even afriad of seeing a doctor

No. I'm not afraid of seeing a doctor. I'm afraid of having an allergic reaction.

Good news is it can be treated

So I've heard. My teacher told me that phobias are among the quickest and easiest psychological disorders to treat.

Thank you for those kind words of encouragement.

When I was young my dad used to tell me that I 'have to be real careful because I can get really sick and die' if I didn't watch out what I eat. That's stuck with me most of my life.

[monique12345]

OK darling, it makes sense how your phobia has grown. Your parents, not to blame them or anything but offcourse you do not want to die or get very sick. Having experienced the reaction this is very frightening. OK, to answer your question about the shots, I am unsure how it is in Canada and if these shots can be taken against peanuts. When i meet the allergy doctor i can ask him to forward you the information. These shots are basically caring the allergen which is injected in your body at intervals to slowly get your body to become immune to them. They work against grass, cats and dogs and a range of things. peanut allergy, if that is what you are certian it is, may be slightly differently treated. your phobia however can be treated and i would strongly recommend you seeing a doctor. Make an appointment and keep me posted if you need support through it. Happy to help. It cannot be easy living with this anxiety as it can take over your life which it seems it nearly has and you are doing well to reach out to not want that for yourself. Again, this takes guts so well done for this, just keep at it now and take the steps to sort this phobia out. Seperate the phobia from yourself and please, let me know what is positive in your life, what you enjoy to help focus on that when you start feeling anxious. What symptoms do you face when you feel anxious? Have you researched allergy shots/treatments, or even done an allergy test? I ask this as what you think you are allergic too may be a cross infection from something you had no idea about - something as simple as yog, hurt or any diary product. Amazing. it is not easy for you to eat out and buy stuff prepacked due to peanuts and traces of. Eating fresh is anyway healthier and most of the allergies in the world is due to this stupid canned and pre packed foods. Try meditation as your mind is so powerful that you may want to redirect your energy to success, rather than this phobia, and therefore squashing it out. Stay in touch buddy. I feel confident that you will be ok if you only start taking the steps forward, rather than sideways out of your own fear. The way i see it, you are in the way of yourself at the moment. Sounds funny, but true.