Webcam incident - paranoid, scared, afraid? HELP

[Guest]

Hello people, i was faced with two seperate incidents that happen over a year ago, close to two. Basically, i webcam-ed in msn with strangers from a chatroom. And you guessed it, i "over-exposed" myself during the short webcam session. Worst of all, my face was showing during the start of the session, but not towards the end. And now, i feel very insecure, afraid and even paranoid to an extent that the webcam session might be recorded.



For the first incident: I suspect that it was a guy but not a girl behind the PC. This "girl" was introduced from a guy i chatted with in the chatroom. As for the cam session, the "girl" i was webcam-ing with didnt show her face at all and made me call her mobile while webcam-ing to hear my voice but she didnt speak cause she said she was shy, i eventually called using a private number. After the cam, i went to ask the guy in the chatroom, if the session might be recorded. He said not to worry, the girl, who was his friend, doesn't know how to record and even gave his cell number to me. And i noticed that the cell number he gave was the same as the one i called while cam-ing with the girl. So, i asked him about it, and he explained that the girl is at his home now with the cell phone, while hes chatting to me while he is at work. Therefore, the whole story sounds pretty hard to believe.



For the 2nd incident: I also cam-ed with another girl i met in the chatroom, on msn. For this incident, at least i felt the opposite party was a girl as through her voice from the mic. I felt bad about webcam-ing, so days after the 2nd incident, i went to asked her if the session was recorded. She replied that it wasn't.



Currently, for the past week, i couldn't stop thinking about these 2 incidents that happened over a year ago. I didn't even give that much thought over it previously. It has been affecting my mood, my studies/work, and everything else. I just can't stop thinking about this, it keeps on running on my head. There was guilt after webcam-ing, but none as strong as now. I know what i have done is wrong and i know i won't return to that chatroom or webcam with strangers ever again. Although, they said that they didnt record the webcam session, but they could be lying to me right? Moreover, my face was showing, even though I was using a fake e-mail acc and name, so they didn't have any of my information.


Am i just being too paranoid or are my concerns valid? I haven't spoken about this incidents to anyone yet, so i am not sure if i should let my mum in on this. Cause the guilt, the fear of being exposed is killing me, and i am afraid it will consume my life away.


P/S orry for the long post. I guess i need some advice on this matter and how to move on.


Thanks.

[Peter L]

You're being paranoid but that is disgusting.

[Techie©]

hello 'guest',
am not going to judge on whatever were doing,that is up to self.



can actualy sort of relate here-its a very long situation so wont bore with details,but had had life messed up by a online user,he pretended to be a friend as well as female [when he was male] for years to extract information,when finished he then passed it off as his own life all over the internet to get attention and was attacked by him as he didnt like others getting support/focus off other users,it ended up with being suicidal,
pyschotic,severely depressed and police on the border of being involved.
was also unable to trust family or support staff at all,as am severely autistic but also diagnosed this year as having lifelong reactive attachment disorder,which was made so much worse by him.
was diagnosed with severe major depressive disorder and pyschosis which had been triggered by him.

there are several things had done to finaly feel better and calmer about life...
-had given up using all the forums,that had felt paranoid from.
-had removed comments ability on the blog,so they coud no longer use their different personas to attack and pretend to be a mate with the other, as well as changing other bits.
-if start to feel any paranoia growing from a forum,will take a break from it,
it feels worse at the begining but it becomes a respite from paranoia getting worse.

-have changed the way that think about the internet.
am a lot more aware of privacy and what reveal,along with how to spot
the fakes from the genuines,of which there is a number of ways.

so,woud personaly say to give up MSN for a while-few weeks maybe at the start,tell everyone that are genuine trustworthy friends on the MSN list,are having a break and for how long.
-dont reveal naked stuff,unless its someone that have met IRL and know what they are capable of,because it can be used in emotional or actual blackmail,in this case its like emotional blackmail by proxy.
the longer that avoid msn,and any connections that have with using the webcam,the more the paranoia will start to lessen,but it wont be instant unfortunately,and may have issues with trust once over the worst.

-as have got their phone numbers,there is a way that might possibly work to get some peace of mind and security assuming it reveals anything,its called doxing-it isnt illegal as its all available online,but will have to check out HF for the sites to do it with,cant recall if have ever doxed anyone or not.

[Death Trap™]

I think your too paranoid. I see people doing that stuff on Omegle chat site even girls who would strip down to bare bottoms and guys wanking away without any fears. You shouldnt be worried. Even if you did, as long as the person who you did it for doesn't know you, you all good. If you knew the person and are not in good terms with, they can blackmail you. Other than that, it would be useless to them anyway.

[Resistance]

My friend,

You are too paranoid. Even though I would believe those people would have assaulted you reading your story, nothing is to worry about. That story was so phony. A guy at work girl at home?... Nobody at "work" would have time to video chat out of the blue. You are completely safe. Do not worry about anything, its just your paranoidness(I inventd that word). Anyways continue your life, do not let it affect you, its one grain of sand in the whole beach. Ignore it.

[Guest]

Hey guys/girls thanks for your replies.

I know that i am actually being paranoid here i guess, since i am just imagining the worst case scenarios in my head, over and over again. I guess its the gulit and shame that is causing this, but this past week i can't seem to think straight and my mind is all over this matter. I wanna know how to put this bad memory off my head and continue with my life normally.

[Death Trap™]

Hey guys/girls thanks for your replies.

I know that i am actually being paranoid here i guess, since i am just imagining the worst case scenarios in my head, over and over again. I guess its the gulit and shame that is causing this, but this past week i can't seem to think straight and my mind is all over this matter. I wanna know how to put this bad memory off my head and continue with my life normally.

Stop worrying and tell yourself nothing will going to happen. Do you know 90 percent of the times people tend to worry about tends not to happen? Focus on more important things at hand and it will slowly drift away.

[Zyptic Jr]

That's messed up but you'll get threw it..

[Project-]

^ , it's 'through'

And Guest, You're being over-paranoid. Just relax, things like this don't always happen. Not everyone runs around with a recorder during a webcam session. Anyways, seriously though , just calm down . Think it through

[Frostbite]

Best bet is just to forget about it. Even if your exposing videos show up on the internet, no one is going to come after you and I hardly doubt they'll use your face in the videos. But, I HIGHLY doubt that those sessions were recorded and it was probably just someone trying to test their power of persuasion and manipulation. Have to be careful on the internet, there are creeps out there.