Death of Grandmother

[stormy]

My grandmother had cancer and recently died a difficult and gruesome death (they believe a tumor in her lung burst blood vessle in her lungs and she drowned in her own blood), it was very traumatic for my grandfather and mother who tried to keep her alive as long as they could (she being a nurse and performing CPR) but they couldn't save her. I was also there and have felt a lot of grief but have an outlook on life that everyone does die, and we have to accept it to deal with it. but Im worried about my grandfather because his world revolved around my grandmother, he worked to keep her as happy as possible. He also lost his mother and son this last year, and is blaming himself. I'm trying as hard to comfort him but i can't even imagine to lose my closest love one. From how hes acting he seems to be transitioning back and forth between denial and blaming himself for not being able to help her. Please give me advice because all I can think to do is hug him and try to keep him from being lonley.

[nightfly]

Hi Stormy, what can i tell you ! actually where do i start, losing someone is not the easiest thing in the world, specially after a difficult period and lots of sufferance ! you tend to feel guilty for not having done enough to help ! well it's all normal ! take it from someone like me, i lost my wife ( she was 47y old) in very similar circumstances , and i wont hide the fact that i felt exactly the same way you do ! but man, you have to face the truth, that is part of life, good moment and bad moments, there is nothing more you could have done and nothing you can do, time will heal every wound ! life must go on, your grandpa' will have to face it too, it's human behavior and moments of weakness , but they will all pass. take courage man, look forward, it is the hardest thing in life is to love someone that death will take away ! you have all my sympathy , time will heal, may sound nonsense for now, but it will.

[Crystal]

Losing someone in life really hurts.. and someone so imp. even more.. The only advise I can give you is that dont leave ur gradad alone for a while , stay with him and convince him that life is like that and loved ones come and go and no is blamed for it,, IT just how earth revolves...
Stay strong and make ur grand dad stronger.
Wish you all the very best for the future..