03-22-2019, 09:11 AM
Hello everyone, lately I've been feeling very sad and confused about how I feel and what should I do.
I'm 19, and I'm in my first year at college. I met two girls in my class, Noelia and Nerea, and the three of us became friends and I really enjoyed the time we spent together.
The thing is, I liked Noelia, but I didn't want to tell her because I knew she didn't like me (and even if I didn't know I wouldn't have told her, I'm very shy). I just wanted things to stay as they were, just being friends.
However, one day they asked me by text who did I like. I didn't want to answer, so I avoided the question. At the end, Noelia got angry for not answering and that made me feel bad.
Some time later, she asked me again, and I decided to tell her. When I said it, she told me to tell her in person.
When monday came, I was extremely nervous. When she arrived at the classroom, I didn't have the courage to talk to her. I couldn't even look at her. She was quiet looking at her phone. When the class ended, I told her before se left, and she just said she didn't feel the same.
After that, I didn't even feel bad. In fact, I was a bit relieved I finally told her. But later that same day there was an event at our faculty, and when she arrived, it looked like she was ignoring me. I thought she may feel a bit weird around me after what happened, and I was also ashamed, so I stayed alone all the time.
The next day, she was still ignoring me, and I asked her if she didn't want us to keeo being friends anymore. She answered that she just wanted to keep distance.
Some days later, I texted her apologizing about what happened, but she got angry at me. She said I was playing the victim and making her look like the bad guy. I tried to tell her that was not it, but she didn't believe me. She said it was my fault she started ignoring me for not acting like if nothing had happened and making her feel bad for rejecting me.
Since then, I've been feeling depressed and crying almost everyday. I used to look forward to classes just to see them again each day, but since then I started just feeling sad, and I've been like this for almost a month now.
Some of my classmates started noticing I was not okay, and tried to cheer me up. I just told what happened to one of my classmates.
And here I am. My head is such a mess. Sometimes I feel like I didn't do anything bad, and sometimes I think it was all my fault.
And lately my own thoughts are destroying me. I feel worthless. When my classmates try to cheer me up, they really do make me feel happy, but then when I'm alone I start thinking and get depressed again, and then I feel like I'm wasting their time for trying to cheer me up when I do this to myself . I keep dreaming about what happened and wake up feeling depressed. I'm also scared I make others feel uncomfortable around me for being sad and leave me too, so I act like I'm fine. Sometimes I feel like I would like to talk about it with them but I don't wanna bother them with my problems and I'm very embarrassed.
I don't know what should I do anymore. Anyone could help me? Thanks a lot.
I'm 19, and I'm in my first year at college. I met two girls in my class, Noelia and Nerea, and the three of us became friends and I really enjoyed the time we spent together.
The thing is, I liked Noelia, but I didn't want to tell her because I knew she didn't like me (and even if I didn't know I wouldn't have told her, I'm very shy). I just wanted things to stay as they were, just being friends.
However, one day they asked me by text who did I like. I didn't want to answer, so I avoided the question. At the end, Noelia got angry for not answering and that made me feel bad.
Some time later, she asked me again, and I decided to tell her. When I said it, she told me to tell her in person.
When monday came, I was extremely nervous. When she arrived at the classroom, I didn't have the courage to talk to her. I couldn't even look at her. She was quiet looking at her phone. When the class ended, I told her before se left, and she just said she didn't feel the same.
After that, I didn't even feel bad. In fact, I was a bit relieved I finally told her. But later that same day there was an event at our faculty, and when she arrived, it looked like she was ignoring me. I thought she may feel a bit weird around me after what happened, and I was also ashamed, so I stayed alone all the time.
The next day, she was still ignoring me, and I asked her if she didn't want us to keeo being friends anymore. She answered that she just wanted to keep distance.
Some days later, I texted her apologizing about what happened, but she got angry at me. She said I was playing the victim and making her look like the bad guy. I tried to tell her that was not it, but she didn't believe me. She said it was my fault she started ignoring me for not acting like if nothing had happened and making her feel bad for rejecting me.
Since then, I've been feeling depressed and crying almost everyday. I used to look forward to classes just to see them again each day, but since then I started just feeling sad, and I've been like this for almost a month now.
Some of my classmates started noticing I was not okay, and tried to cheer me up. I just told what happened to one of my classmates.
And here I am. My head is such a mess. Sometimes I feel like I didn't do anything bad, and sometimes I think it was all my fault.
And lately my own thoughts are destroying me. I feel worthless. When my classmates try to cheer me up, they really do make me feel happy, but then when I'm alone I start thinking and get depressed again, and then I feel like I'm wasting their time for trying to cheer me up when I do this to myself . I keep dreaming about what happened and wake up feeling depressed. I'm also scared I make others feel uncomfortable around me for being sad and leave me too, so I act like I'm fine. Sometimes I feel like I would like to talk about it with them but I don't wanna bother them with my problems and I'm very embarrassed.
I don't know what should I do anymore. Anyone could help me? Thanks a lot.