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Homesick
#1
Hello. I'm writing to you today because I don't know who else to speak to about a problem that I've been dealing with for more than a year. I've been having anxiety issues when it comes to going out. I spend a lot of time at home and whenever I need to go out for school, work or friends call me up to do something with them, I suddenly feel uneasy. Most of the time, my stomach gets gassy and I feel nervous/anxious stomach. In cases when it's really bad, I have to go to the washroom and I have diarrhea. At first I thought it was IBS when the doctor told me what the symptoms resemble but then I realized that it's mostly psychological. I can be home, watching TV or on my computer on Facebook, doing well, and as soon as I get a call or text from a buddy telling me we're going out tonight, my stomach will get gassy and uneasy. Sometimes, if I work during the day and have something planned (supper or party) at nighttime, I will begin to get stomach spasms and gas a couple of hours before the time of the event and it will get worse at time progresses closer to the time of the event. Most of the time, I still end up going out because I know that once I'm not thinking about it or once I'm too busy to think about it or my mind isn't focused on being sick, I won't feel sick. So for example, I get a call saying I'm going out at night, I feel gassy but still have my friend pick me up. Once I'm in his car, we are talking and having fun and I don't think about it and I don't feel sick in the moment. As soon as I think about it again, I feel gassy and hear my stomach shifting and turning. The reason I am telling you this today is because the problem has gotten so bad since it has a snowball effect. If I don't go out one night because I feel too sick to do so, I will stay home. When the next event comes along( next week perhaps) , because I skipped the last one, the anxiety of going out will make me even more nervous and I will never end up going out. And it just keep building and building. No matter how gassy I feel or bad my stomach is moaning, as soon as I get home, everything calms down over time as I feel like I'm in my comfort zone. I feel that is exactly the problem. I spend way to much time at home that when I'm not home, I'm homesick. This problem is ruining my life because my friend's think that whenever I bail on them last minute it's because I'm not trustworthy when in fact I'm really trustworthy but simply have problems. I've tried telling them but its hard to explain someone something that you don't even know what it is yourself.
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#2
My advice to you would be to go see your primary doctor.
Then, if you need to see a specialist He/She will direct you to one.
I hope you get better, I really do.
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#3
(12-09-2011, 11:31 AM)User Bars Wrote: My advice to you would be to go see your primary doctor.
Then, if you need to see a specialist He/She will direct you to one.
I hope you get better, I really do.

I don't have a family doctor or my own doctor. It is very hard to get one nowadays. And if I went to a walk-in clinic and told a doctor about this, they wouldn't know what to do with it since it's psychological.
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#4
(12-09-2011, 11:55 AM)EagerToLearn Wrote: I don't have a family doctor or my own doctor. It is very hard to get one nowadays. And if I went to a walk-in clinic and told a doctor about this, they wouldn't know what to do with it since it's psychological.

That may be the fact.
But you never know until you try my friend.
Like I said, they may send you to another specialist.
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#5
(12-09-2011, 12:25 PM)User Bars Wrote: That may be the fact.
But you never know until you try my friend.
Like I said, they may send you to another specialist.

Given the information I've told you, how do YOU suggest I overcome this problem? Considering this forum is for users to help users, not having users refer users to specialist (although you are right, that is the best thing to do in this situation, I would still like your advice).
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#6
(12-09-2011, 12:30 PM)EagerToLearn Wrote: Given the information I've told you, how do YOU suggest I overcome this problem? Considering this forum is for users to help users, not having users refer users to specialist (although you are right, that is the best thing to do in this situation, I would still like your advice).
Okay, here's my opinion.
Start to explore where ever you live.
You're homesick, you need to get out at least an hour a day and socialize at a restaurant, bar, anything like that to break off the ties to your house.
You seem to be sheltered and starting to only accept that.
Call your friends, and plan something to do.
They'll be surprised that your the one doing the socializing.
Go out in a big group, and take some Tums/Baptismal before you go.
This is my advice.
You need to get used to people, and not your home.
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#7
(12-09-2011, 12:35 PM)User Bars Wrote: Okay, here's my opinion.
Start to explore where ever you live.
You're homesick, you need to get out at least an hour a day and socialize at a restaurant, bar, anything like that to break off the ties to your house.
You seem to be sheltered and starting to only accept that.
Call your friends, and plan something to do.
They'll be surprised that your the one doing the socializing.
Go out in a big group, and take some Tums/Baptismal before you go.
This is my advice.
You need to get used to people, and not your home.

"You need to get used to people, and not your home." What tips can you give me to get over the big hump that will keep telling me not to at the beginning of me trying to do this?
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#8
(12-09-2011, 03:37 PM)EagerToLearn Wrote: "You need to get used to people, and not your home." What tips can you give me to get over the big hump that will keep telling me not to at the beginning of me trying to do this?
If you're beginning to get nervous like you seem to do, or "feel out of place."
I suggest finding an object in the back of your mind, and focusing hard on that till it goes away.
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