It sounds like you’re really tuning into the nuances of your feelings, which is honestly the hardest and most important part. Labels can be useful tools, but they’re not rules you have to follow perfectly. For me, I found that letting go of the pressure to "fit" into a specific category helped me focus more on what felt authentic in the moment, rather than trying to pin down a neat definition. Connections can definitely vary in intensity and meaning, and that’s totally normal. Sometimes I’ve felt closer to someone regardless of gender, and other times the gender aspect felt more significant - but both experiences were valid. It’s okay to embrace that fluidity without rushing to label it. You’re not alone in feeling this way, and your journey is yours to explore at your own pace.