Alice

When someone you care about is going through a hard time, it’s natural to want to help. You might see the sadness in their face, hear the heaviness in their voice, or notice them withdrawing from the things they usually enjoy. And yet, the words “I don’t know what to say” often come to mind. Being there for a struggling friend doesn’t mean having all the answers. It’s about showing up, listening, and reminding them that they don’t have to carry their pain alone. Start With Presence, Not SolutionsMost of us instinctively want to fix things for the people we love. But often, what someone really needs isn’t advice — it’s presence. They want to feel heard, not managed. Sometimes sitting together in silence, sending a short message that says “thinking of you,” or simply giving them a space to talk is more powerful than any solution you could offer. Listen Without Rushing to RespondGood listening is harder than it sounds. We often prepare our reply while the other person is still speaking. Instead, give your friend the gift of full attention. Let them finish, pause, and then respond with something simple like, “That sounds really hard.” Resist the urge to interrupt with your own story right away. There will be time for sharing, but right now, their pain deserves the centre of the conversation. Validate Their FeelingsOne of the most supportive things you can say is, “It makes sense that you feel this way.” People often doubt themselves in tough moments, wondering if they’re “too sensitive” or “overreacting.” By acknowledging that their feelings are valid, you help them feel grounded. Offer Gentle Support Instead of PressurePhrases like “You just need to cheer up” or “Have you tried…” can feel dismissive, even if meant kindly. Instead, focus on gentle offers: “I’m here if you want to talk.” “Would it help if I came over?” “Do you want me to listen, or would advice be useful right now?” This gives them choice and respects where they’re at. Notice the Small ThingsStruggling friends may not ask for help directly. Look out for subtle signs: messages left unread, cancelled plans, or shifts in mood. Sometimes a quick check-in like “I noticed you’ve been quiet — how are you doing?” can open a door they didn’t know they could walk through. Encourage Professional Help if NeededIf your friend’s struggles seem overwhelming or ongoing, encourage them gently to consider professional support. You don’t need to diagnose or push. A simple, “Have you thought about talking to someone who could support you through this?” shows care without judgment. Take Care of Yourself TooSupporting a struggling friend can take a toll on your own emotions. It’s important to set boundaries and remember that you can’t pour from an empty cup. Allow yourself space to rest, lean on others when you need to, and recognise that you can care deeply without carrying all of their pain yourself. Final ThoughtBeing there for a friend who’s struggling isn’t about grand gestures. It’s the small, steady reminders that they are not alone: the listening ear, the patient silence, the simple “I care about you.” You don’t need perfect words. You don’t need to solve their problems. What matters most is that your friend knows they have someone who will walk beside them, no matter how rough the path feels right now.

We all go through moments when our emotions feel like too much. It might be anger that boils over, sadness that sits like a heavy weight on your chest, or anxiety that seems to take control of your breathing and thoughts. When those waves come, it’s easy to feel powerless, like you’re being pulled under. But emotions, as painful as they can be, aren’t our enemies. They’re signals from our mind and body, trying to tell us something important. Learning to cope doesn’t mean ignoring how you feel or pretending it isn’t happening. It means finding gentle ways to ride the storm until the waves pass. Why feelings can feel “too big”Emotions become overwhelming for many reasons. Sometimes they arrive suddenly, like panic in the middle of a quiet evening. Other times they build up, layer after layer, until stress, grief and exhaustion all sit on your shoulders at once. What makes them harder is when we tell ourselves we “shouldn’t” feel that way, or when the emotions bring back old fears. The body reacts as if it’s under attack: heart racing, muscles tense, thoughts spinning. It’s a natural response, but it can feel frightening if you don’t have ways to steady yourself. Start by pausingOne of the simplest ways to find your footing is to pause and breathe. When emotions are high, your body slips into survival mode. Slow breathing helps switch that off. Breathe in gently through your nose, hold for a moment, then breathe out slowly through your mouth. Do it a few times until you feel even the smallest shift. You don’t need to force calmness. Just giving yourself those few breaths can create enough space to think more clearly. Give your feelings a nameIt can help to say out loud, or write down, what you’re actually feeling. Instead of “I can’t cope,” try, “I feel hurt because I wasn’t listened to,” or “I feel anxious about what’s ahead.” Naming the feeling doesn’t solve it, but it stops it from being this huge, nameless cloud hanging over you. It turns it into something you can look at and eventually move through. Anchor yourself in the presentWhen emotions are strong, the mind often jumps into the past or races ahead to the future. One way to pull yourself back into the moment is to use your senses. Notice what you can see around you, touch with your hands, hear in the background. Look for the small details: the sound of your breathing, the texture of your clothes, the shape of the room you’re in. This pulls your mind away from spirals and back into something solid and safe: the present. Let it move through youMany of us grow up thinking we have to hold everything in, but emotions don’t disappear just because we push them down. They sit inside us, waiting to come out. Sometimes the kindest thing you can do is to let the emotion move. That might mean crying without apologising, writing every thought in a journal, or going for a walk to let your body release some of the tension. If you’re angry, punching a pillow or shouting into the shower can be surprisingly freeing. It doesn’t mean you’re out of control. It means you’re giving your feelings somewhere to go. Talk to yourself with kindnessNotice the words you use when you’re struggling. If they sound harsh — “I’m weak,” “I should be stronger,” “I’m failing again” — you’re only adding another layer of pain. Try speaking to yourself as you would to someone you care about. “This is hard, but it’s okay to feel this way.” “I’m doing my best.” You don’t need to say grand affirmations if they don’t feel natural. A simple kind sentence is enough. Habits that help in the long runWhile these small steps can calm emotions in the moment, there are habits that make it easier to stay steady overall. Sleeping well, moving your body, eating regularly and keeping a daily rhythm all support your mind as much as your body. Creative outlets — music, painting, writing, even cooking — give feelings a way to express themselves without building up inside. And most of all, connection matters. Sharing your feelings with people you trust helps lighten the load. It reminds you that you don’t have to carry it all alone. When it still feels unmanageableSometimes emotions feel overwhelming no matter what you try. If your feelings are constant, stopping you from living your life, or driving you to harmful coping methods, it may help to talk with a professional. Reaching out for therapy or counselling isn’t weakness. It’s an act of care for yourself, a sign that you deserve relief and peace. Final thoughtStrong emotions can feel like a storm, fierce and unrelenting. But storms pass. Each time you pause to breathe, each time you put your feelings into words, each time you show yourself even a little compassion, you’re reminding yourself that you have an anchor. Coping with overwhelming emotions isn’t about erasing them. It’s about learning that you can survive them — and over time, even grow stronger because of them.

Losing someone you love changes everything. The world looks different, the days feel heavier, and sometimes it’s hard to even know what you’re supposed to do next. Grief isn’t something you can “fix.” It’s something you learn to live with, one day at a time. Here are some gentle reminders and ideas that might help when the pain feels overwhelming. Give Yourself Permission to FeelThere’s no “right” way to grieve. Some days you might cry nonstop. Other days you might feel strangely okay, and then guilty for it. All of that is normal. Don’t judge your feelings — they’re all part of the process. Hold On to MemoriesTalking about the person you lost, looking at photos, or even writing down memories can bring comfort. Remembering doesn’t make the pain worse — it keeps their presence alive in your heart. Lean on People Who CareYou don’t have to carry grief alone. It helps to talk, even if it’s just saying, “I miss them today.” Let friends or family know how they can support you, whether that’s listening, sharing a meal, or just sitting quietly together. Take Care of Your Body, TooGrief is exhausting. Eating, resting, and moving your body might feel impossible, but small acts of care matter. A walk around the block, a glass of water, or an early night can help your strength slowly return. Expect Ups and DownsGrief isn’t a straight line. Some days will feel lighter, and then out of nowhere a memory, a song, or an anniversary can hit you hard. That doesn’t mean you’re “back at the start.” It’s just the way grief works. Be gentle with yourself when those waves come. Find Little Moments of ComfortIt might be listening to a favourite song, cooking a meal they loved, lighting a candle, or spending time in nature. These small rituals can create pockets of peace in the middle of the storm. Give Time, Don’t Set DeadlinesPeople may tell you that you should be “moving on.” The truth is: you never really move on — you move forward, carrying your love and memories with you. Take the time you need. Final ThoughtLoss changes you, and it’s okay that life feels different now. Grief is not about forgetting; it’s about learning to live in a new way while still holding on to the love you shared. Take things one day, one step, one breath at a time. That’s enough.