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+---- Thread: Am I doing something wrong? (/showthread.php?tid=24729)
Am I doing something wrong? - Guest - 01-20-2012
I know it's a young age, but I'm 16 years old. I've never had a girlfriend nor my first kiss. I feel like a loser and it just feels so out of place. It's not that I can't make friends easy. I'm an easy going person, and I do have a lot of friends in my opinion. I can talk to girls just fine about anything. I just can't get in a relationship. I'll have crushes on girls and it won't lead anywhere. I always fear rejection, and I know someone will just say, grow some balls and get over it, it's kind of a hard thing to do for me. I have tried, and asked a girl out before, and she rejected it and I felt so humiliated, I still think about it everyday. I use to be really popular last year, and I don't know what happened over summer, but it seems as if I've lost a bunch of friends or everyone stopped talking to me, I seem to be the one making an effort in friendships. I just don't know what to do, all of my friends are in relationships and bug me about it, and I really don't know. It doesn't help that I have high standards and look for a smart good looking girl. I have some serious self esteem issues as-well. I always think low of myself and have no way to fix it. There's so many imperfections in me.
I just really need someone to talk to, I'm going through a difficult time.
RE: Am I doing something wrong? - skorch - 01-20-2012
Don't get into a relationship because everyone else is. Also, don't get too worked up over it. Try to make friends with more girls and see how it goes but try not to get friend zoned. Go out with a girl because you like her not because of other reasons.
RE: Am I doing something wrong? - King - 01-20-2012
The 'We should hang out some time' line seems right for you. If you can befriend girls, there's no reason you two can't hang out together (on a weekend or something). Once you're alone, take it from there buddy.
RE: Am I doing something wrong? - Guest - 01-20-2012
I can't talk to them alone though, and it's not a matter of that, I have a really low self-esteem sometimes.
None of my friends will ever go on double dates either, everyone always friendzones me. :'(
RE: Am I doing something wrong? - King - 01-20-2012
(01-20-2012, 08:15 PM)Guest Wrote: I can't talk to them alone though, and it's not a matter of that, I have a really low self-esteem sometimes.
None of my friends will ever go on double dates either, everyone always friendzones me. :'(
Why can't you talk to them alone? That's stupid. If need be, do it on Facebook.
RE: Am I doing something wrong? - Guest - 01-20-2012
I tell girls they're beautiful and everything. I use to have an amazing self-confidence but the girl I really liked for about 2 years rejected me aswell. I've been rejected everytime I try to do anything so far. excuse my english because it is my second language.
RE: Am I doing something wrong? - King - 01-20-2012
(01-20-2012, 08:27 PM)Guest Wrote: I tell girls they're beautiful and everything. I use to have an amazing self-confidence but the girl I really liked for about 2 years rejected me aswell. I've been rejected everytime I try to do anything so far. excuse my english because it is my second language.
No wonder you're getting rejected if you're going around calling everyone beautiful. Save the compliments for when ya'll are hanging out.
RE: Am I doing something wrong? - Guest - 01-20-2012
i just hate my horrible low self esteem.
RE: Am I doing something wrong? - Peter L - 01-20-2012
Ok, I'm tired of this. Post #1 I felt empathy, post #2 I said ok that's understandable, post #3 was a little worse, but post #4 pissed me off.
You will for the rest of your life have a low self-esteem if you think like that. I'm 100% fudging serious. The only way you'll listen is the truth: stop being a bitch and stop caring what people think. You are what you are, and screw the rest. Those who mind don't matter and those that matter don't mind. Stop with the low self-esteem, you put that on yourself. Some days I feel like absolute crap and other days I feel like I can rule the world. It's how you think about it. Want to know the truth? Nobody counts how many times you fudge up, except you. The days I feel bad it is because I think I screwed something up (even if it is small) and that people see me different because of it. Nope, no one does. It's all in my head. That is why I wake up in the morning with my positive mindset, and it shows. My confidence shows, people notice confidence. You need to understand this. You're in high school, nothing you do in your school is significant to what you do when you graduate, socially speaking. Most people you'll never see again. So make High School the best it can be, now is you best excuse to not give a fudge. Ask anyone out, stand up for yourself. Do whatever you want.
As for girls, don't talk to ones you only briefly met on Facebook..talk to them in real life, don't "try hard" and flatter girls until the compliments become regular, and don't be nervous in front of girls. News flash, they are humans. They interact just as you do, what do you like when people talk to you? Chances are they like the same thing. If they don't seem interested in you: THEY ARE NOT INTERESTED IN YOU. But what do you have to say? So what. The guys you see who "get mad girls" only get them because they talk to a lot of them. They will get rejected just as much as you if you hung out with the same amount of girls as them. Just be yourself. A great pick-up line is this "hey whats up." After you two know each other adequately well, tell her this: "wanna hangout sometime?" Tell her all of this in person. Then you go hangout, and if you two like each other it will be obvious. You pursue from there. If you fudge up, who cares? No one is keeping track of your screw ups and you learned what not to do in the future.
You're in HS, the perfect time for "Just Do It." So just do it. Not next week, not in a little bit. Tomorrow.