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+---- Thread: I feel so disconnected and dont know why (/showthread.php?tid=24288)
I feel so disconnected and dont know why - Hendrix123 - 01-03-2012
Ive just turned 16 and ive recently just became, i wouldnt say depressed, but just fed up. I find it hard to get close to people, which is strange because i used to have loads of friends and was quite outgoing, but now ive got about 5 fiends that i regulary talk to, but there is only one i feel any real friendship with. My grades have also slipped dramatically, and i always fake illness to stay off. When i first started high school, i was rather fat and so had little confidence, then when i lost my wieght i got a facefull of spots, so yeah puberty is a cold harted bitch. But somehow back then i was even more outgoing than i am now, even though my spots have gotten better and i feel rather okay with myself on the outside. The only thing that has changed for the better is that i find it easier to talk to girls than before. Back then i was a mumbling idiot when it came to girls, but now i can at least hold a conversation. Ive never had a proper girlfriend, there was this one girl last summer that i really liked, and she was definitely flirting with me (she even admitted that to me) so i told her that i liked her, and we ended up talking u until 2 in the morning on the phone. Then i was suppossed to meet her the next day, and i would have loved to but i couldnt, i had other things planned, then the next day she gave me the old "Lets just be friends" story, just out of the blue. I took it quite hard to be honest but i never showed it, i just kept my distance from everyone, it was the only time to this date i ever felt i liked someone trully, and ever since ive been like that. I know i shoulld just move on, but there is no one else in the school that i like, and i dont just mean on a shallow looks based reason, its just i cant really get close to anyone else and i never socialise outside of school, that just seems out of the question now. Im not a total social outcast or anything i can still have a laugh with people. I hardly ever go out with the few friends i have, id rather stay and play my guitar or listen to music (The beatles are about the only thing that brings me happiness right now
), which i find is more relaxing than the nuisance of putting on a brave face. Ive had quite a few family issues as well that i wont go into detail with, and they all happened aound summer as well. I just dont know what to do, i never feel motivated, i want to get better but i dont know how, ive got 2 more years left of school and i dont want to leave feeling like this.
RE: I feel so disconnected and dont know why - King - 01-03-2012
Hi Hendrix,
Welcome to Support Forums. It sounds as though you're getting closer to a state of depression. Something we don't want. What I'd recommend is to find one thing you enjoy most in life and stick to it. If it's your music, work hard on it, because once you're out of school, it might get you somewhere. There's no use in forgetting about your social life when in school either. You've still got a few years left and it'll be a living hell if you go on like this. I know at times you're not going to feel motivated to go out with mates, but try to make an effort. It may be a pain in the ass getting there, but you'll enjoy yourself and feel a lot less stressed because you're making an effort socially. As for girls, they'll come. Don't get too up in arms about that at the moment, focus more on your mates and establishing some more accepted social patterns.
I don't know if anything I've said will help. It just seems that you're being a little lazy. Find motivation in your passions and make an effort to get out. Things will improve.
RE: I feel so disconnected and dont know why - Hendrix123 - 01-03-2012
(01-03-2012, 07:42 PM)King Wrote: Hi Hendrix,
Welcome to Support Forums. It sounds as though you're getting closer to a state of depression. Something we don't want. What I'd recommend is to find one thing you enjoy most in life and stick to it. If it's your music, work hard on it, because once you're out of school, it might get you somewhere. There's no use in forgetting about your social life when in school either. You've still got a few years left and it'll be a living hell if you go on like this. I know at times you're not going to feel motivated to go out with mates, but try to make an effort. It may be a pain in the ass getting there, but you'll enjoy yourself and feel a lot less stressed because you're making an effort socially. As for girls, they'll come. Don't get too up in arms about that at the moment, focus more on your mates and establishing some more accepted social patterns.
I don't know if anything I've said will help. It just seems that you're being a little lazy. Find motivation in your passions and make an effort to get out. Things will improve.
Thanks for the reply. I do acknowledge i have been lazy, but honestly theres not much to do in scotland even if i did go out anyway. Ive got over that girl and i talk to her now and then still. I do have more than five actual friends, its just those five that i really do stuff outside of school with. I dont think i am depressed though, like i said i can still enjoy other peoples company.