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+---- Thread: I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... (/showthread.php?tid=23347)
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I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... - Slick_ - 11-20-2011
I'm tired of him trying to say he's not going to drink anymore, but he gets drunk 3 days later anyways. At least once a week, he'll get really drunk, and then the next morning he apologizes to everybody and says he's quitting drinking. Then a couple days later, he's drinking again, and it's just a big cycle. I hardly ever talk to him anymore, and he is pushing me to go to baseball workouts today, and I just keep saying "No". I don't say anything else, I don't look at him, I just can't stand him anymore. He got drunk last night, and this morning he apologized, and all I said was "I don't care". And I really don't care anymore. What should I do?
RE: I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... - WTC - 11-20-2011
This is a hard issue to deal with, as most people that abuse alcohol choose not to listen to those around them to stop.
If he doesn't want to get help, it will be very difficult for you to get him to help himself. It starts with him sacrificing the urge to stop/get help.
You need to show him the damage he is causing. An example needs to be layed out for him so he can actually witness what he
is causing to you & your family. Speak with a rehab center to get some basic facts on alcohol abuse and point those facts out to him
Do not be mad at him, He is remorseful for what he's doing if he's apologizing. Its an addiction he is in to deep. He realizes this.
Confusion is what is not motivating him to stop. He needs someone to physically point him in the right direction. Because just telling
him "you need to go to AA" is not going to work. How about set up appointments for him to AA classes, go with him the first few times
until he gets adjusted to it. He can most definitely stop drinking..He needs to lower it down a tone.. a beer or 2, some food, some wine..
Until he just does'nt crave it anymore. But most important your family is going to need to help him to get up and go get help for himself.
RE: I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... - Slick_ - 11-20-2011
Well, today he seems more serious about quitting than usual, but we'll see how long that lasts. When I mention AA or counseling to my mom she just says "I can't make him stop something he doesn't want to"
RE: I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... - Ignite. - 11-20-2011
Well, if you honestly want the best for your father, then ignore her that sounds kinda bad, but it will benefit everyone in the future, so go get help in my suggestion bud.
RE: I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... - kebralt - 11-20-2011
Tell him straight up that he always talks about quitting drinking, but it never happens. Tell him unless he's serious, you can't respect him anymore.
RE: I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... - RIPLEY11 - 12-11-2011
tell him that you have lost all your respect for him and walk out. This will hopefully shock him into a realisation of what he has actually done. he probably does not understand what he is doing to you and his family, he needs to realise this before he will change!
RE: I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... - User Bars - 12-11-2011
I'd give him one last warning.
Sit down with him and remind him how much he means to you as a father figure and how if he keeps drinking you can't have his bad influence in your life.
He should understand that if he cares drastically about you and stop getting drunk so often, if not my friend I'm afraid it's time to move on and broaden your horizons as hard as that will be, it's what is best.
RE: I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... - Renowned - 12-11-2011
He doesn't seem to deserve to be in your company, tell him he won't see you until he's clean.
RE: I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... - Caffeine - 12-14-2011
Sometimes it takes a harsh wake up call to realize the mistakes you have made. It's unfortunate, but you should not give in to your father's requests and humor him by being there with/for him.
You're going to feel bad, but your happiness and his impact on your life is important and should be taken seriously.
RE: I feel bad for blowing off my dad, but.... - Speedy - 12-14-2011
I must say i wouldn't know what to do in this situation this must be really hard :/