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+---- Thread: Two groups of friends (/showthread.php?tid=18227)
Two groups of friends - Solidify - 04-23-2011
I got this problem that I don't want to get any worse. I have two groups of friends. One group is friends from my elementary and high school and basically the people that I stayed with all through high school. The other group of friends is roughly 5-10 people. I met them all through my best friend, who is older than me, so they are too. But I prefer staying with them because they are more mature and I feel more respected and valued in their group. I still hang out with my other friends because they are all my friends from when we were young, etc. But it's really annoying now because I'm getting to the point where I need to decide which group to prioritize. Like for example, tonight, I have a birthday to go to for a friend that is in the group of people that I went to high school with and stayed with a lot up until college. Me and the other group of friends (older ones) that I stay with more had been planning to go out tonight (Easter weekend) even before his invite. So I don't know what to do, not only for tonight, but in general.. because I know this is the first of many conflicts I'll be faced with. I've already thought about just inviting them all to do stuff together but it's really difficult because they don't share common interests and quite frankly, they don't know each other. I don't want to be left with neither because I neglected to make up my mind but then again, I really don't want to have to choose between friends. I like them all.
What should I do?
RE: Two groups of friends - BlackOperations - 04-23-2011
Well go with the ones that invted u first and tell the other group you cant make it..
RE: Two groups of friends - BlackChaos - 04-23-2011
It's really difficult to make everyone friends, so it doesn't always work.
Unless your friends in the first group like your new friends' company, you can't hang out with them both at the same time. I wouldn't say you shouldn't disconnect with one group to go to the other group. What I would suggest is that you spend some time with one group, then spend some time with the other, and in time you will have both groups. But talk to your friends about it, and see how they feel about joining these groups together. If they doesn't like it, tell them that you'll spend time equally with both groups. And first debate on if your new friends are trustworthy, whether you know them well yet - you need to find which friends are your true friends.
In this particular situation though, Its better to go with the plan that you've already made and stick with it. Its better to say that your sticking to your older commitments, rather than cancelling them for a new one. If they are your friends, they'll understand =)
RE: Two groups of friends - Psycho Mantis™ - 04-23-2011
I can identify with this situation... You should choose based on how you feel when you hang out with them. And because you choose a group that doesn't mean you have to complete isolate yourself from the other. You can stay friends with both but you'll just have to choose one side to give priority to. So just think carefully about it and make up your mind. Who's group your more comfortable with, who would be there for you if you needed, who would you wanna invite to your wedding, who would you wanna present your new girlfriend first, who do you trust most, etc. Common man, deep inside you and only you know the answer. ;)
RE: Two groups of friends - Brandenx781 - 04-23-2011
To be honest, I think you should go to the birthday party. I think it's more important than a little Easter dinner. You can still become friends with both groups. Just imagine yourself where you would to be with.
But since you made plans to go to the Easter dinner FIRST then that would be a more of a committed choice. You could just tell your first group that the other group invited you first to the dinner.