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+---- Thread: How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? (/showthread.php?tid=12727)
How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? - Reality - 10-13-2010
How do you help people when you are either helping them feel better or make whatever it is better?
I personally prefer not to be really nice about things else it'll make them just feel pitied. However if you're being more forceful or say things that come out mean I believe it gets the point across better and people usually see what you are trying to say better, and if they don't they may be taken back; but it's worth it imo.
You?
RE: How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? - Heli0s - 10-13-2010
You have have to reassure them that this is for their own good and that no matter how harsh you are, you're doing it because you care.
RE: How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? - Reality - 10-13-2010
Doesn't really matter to me how they take it.
If they're going to think that everything is against them in life, then they aren't meant to be asking about it. Someone is going to say something one day that someone will take the wrong way, better sooner than never.
RE: How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? - Thomas - 10-13-2010
If you're talking about helping them out as in cheering them up, I've found that laughter really is the best medicine. If you're talking about correcting someone I tell them straight up like it is, if they can't take it or over react about it, they don't deserve my help.
RE: How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? - Fragma - 10-13-2010
You know it's impossible to smile without feeling happy? Thomas is right in my opinion.. Laughter is the best medicine. Cheer them up and get there mind off whatever it may be thats getting them down.
I always like to give advice though. I tell my friends what I think they need to hear whether they like it or not (If they are asking for my advice that is).
RE: How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? - Thomas - 10-13-2010
(10-13-2010, 03:11 PM)Fragma Wrote: If they are asking for my advice that is
Sometimes I even give advice when people aren't asking for it!
RE: How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? - Eve - 10-13-2010
(10-13-2010, 03:11 PM)Fragma Wrote: You know it's impossible to smile without feeling happy?
This. It is very difficult for people to feel proactive or capable when they feel miserable. Some escapism may be necessary for hurt feelings to ease, before they become receptive to advice.
Off-topic, Reality, try Fragma or Untouch for help with your userbar request.
RE: How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? - Reality - 10-13-2010
It'll have to be Thomas since he doesn't have 500 posts to steal my idea :3
RE: How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? - Thomas - 10-14-2010
(10-13-2010, 08:18 PM)Reality Wrote: It'll have to be Thomas since he doesn't have 500 posts to steal my idea :3
Goodluck getting anyone to join your group if I designed your userbars!
RE: How to use Criticism and Discipline/Helping? - Disease - 10-15-2010
(10-13-2010, 09:45 AM)Reality Wrote: How do you help people when you are either helping them feel better or make whatever it is better?
I personally prefer not to be really nice about things else it'll make them just feel pitied. However if you're being more forceful or say things that come out mean I believe it gets the point across better and people usually see what you are trying to say better, and if they don't they may be taken back; but it's worth it imo.
You?
So you're asking how I give criticism? Your wording is rather convoluted. If it's criticism I'm giving then it's nothing personal, so I don't bother holding back. I point out what I see, why I believe it to be wrong (or at least not right) and offer suggestions on how to correct it.
You can tell those who can take criticism from those who can't though. Those who can't take it always shoot back complaints about lack of niceties. I've been told before that I should lead criticism off with "In my opinion..." or "It's good but I think..." Of course it's my opinion, who's else is it? And if I don't think whatever it is I'm criticizing is good, I'm not going to say that just to pad what I have to say with superficial junk.