Sexuality & Gender

living in a small town can be both cozy and stifling, especially when it comes to exploring and expressing gender identity. i grew up in a place where everyone knows everyone, and change isn't always welcomed with open arms. it wasn't until i left for college that i really started to understand and embrace my gender identity. but not everyone has that opportunity or wants to leave their hometown. so how do you navigate this journey when you're in a place where people might not understand or accept you? one thing that helped me was finding online communities and forums where i could connect with others going through similar experiences. it was like finding a secret clu…

so, i've been thinking a lot about how to approach the topic of pronouns with my family. my brother came out as non-binary a few months back, and while most of us have been supportive, pronouns have been a bit of a learning curve for some. at first, it was a struggle for everyone to remember to use 'they/them' instead of 'he/him.' i even slipped up a couple of times, but now it's becoming second nature. what's helped a ton is practicing in everyday conversations and gently correcting each other without making a big deal of it. anyways, i was curious if anyone has tips or stories on how they’ve navigated this? especially with family who might not be as open-minded or a…

Okay guys, so here’s the thing. I’ve been pondering over my situation for a while now, you know just trying to figure out who I really am. I guess you could say the covid lockdown was somewhat of a soul searching period for me. It’s only now that I feel comfortable enough to reach out about it. I’ve always pictured myself as a heterosexual guy, like no questions asked. Yet, lately I’m not so sure. I find myself drawn to guys as well as girls, it’s pretty disorientating. Moreover, I’ve started feeling so much more content and, well, almost happier when amongst my female friends and just relating more to femininity. It’s been quite a confusing whirlwind, y’know? I…

Hey there, wonderful people! Deciding to come out can be both thrilling and scary. One helpful tip I’ve learned during my own journey is to remember that everyone’s reaction will be different. Some people may not understand immediately, and that’s okay. It’s not a reflection of you, but often a reflection of their own knowledge or lack of understanding. Educate rather than become upset. Breathe, stay calm and know that there are loads of resources for you and those you share with. The Human Rights Campaign has a brilliant section on their website about coming out, which is definitely worth a look. Know that you’re not alone, whether it’s sharing your journe…

Heyo, so I’ve kinda been wrestling with this gnarly thing in my head for a while now, and just needed to spit it out somewhere I know it won’t be judged (I hope). Call it late night overthinking, but I am somewhat struggling to label my sexuality and gender. The logic behind my giant muddle up? Stick around and I’ll try to make sense of it for both of us. Basically, I grew up in a pretty traditional household. Yknow, the whole narrative of boys liking girls, girls liking boys, nothing out of the so-called “norm”. But over time and especially after 2020 (what a whirlwind that year was, huh?), I started reading up on a whole variety of genders and sexualities- demisexua…

I was sat on my old, creaky kitchen stool the other night, flicking through an old photo album with my daughter, and we stumbled across my elementary school pictures. Wide collars, bowl cuts, corduroy – the works! Now what struck me, staring into the faces of my younger self and friends, was the distinct “gendering” of everything. The boys in “boyish” clothes, the girls in “girlie” styles. It got me thinking about the early education environment and how it potentially relates to our initial understanding of gender. Did the pink vs. blue, the soldier vs. princess really mould us into perceiving gender in a predetermined way? Or were these distinctions an innocent part…

hey all, not really sure how to start this but here i am. i’ve been reading a lot of posts here lately and i see an abundance of support and understanding being shared around, which made me decide to put my thoughts out there. ever since i was young there’s always been something that felt… off, for lack of a better word. i’m biologically male, but i haven’t ever quite felt ‘male’ in the traditional sense. i’m not saying i feel like i’m a female either, at least not exclusively. it’s like some days i wake up feeling more masculine and other days i’m just feeling more feminine, if that makes sense? just to add, i’ve been doing some research and terms like genderflui…

hey there, tossin’ this out just cos it’s been on my mind a lot lately and I thought maybe this group might get it… trying to figure out my own gender identity and it ain’t as easy as I thought it would be. Always felt a bit off I guess? Not really fitting into what they told me was ‘normal’. Growing up, my friends were all into boys or girls, didn’t seem to matter which, but they were sure about it y’know? But me? Never really felt that way. Tried dating both boys and girls but nothing really clicked. Its been years, and now, with all the talk online about different genders and sexualities, I started to wonder if maybe that’s what’s up. I’ve been reading about al…

So, lately, I’ve found myself grappling with some pretty deep self-realizations. You know, the kinda stuff that’s typically reserved for late-night solo thinking sessions. If I’m honest, I had pushed these feelings under the rug for years but they’re nagging at me now, more upfront and louder than ever. Well, where to begin? Aha, classic me, rambling on without getting to the point. Anyway, here’s the deal. I’ve always identified as cisgender male, pretty straightforward, right? But these past few months have made me question if that label really fits what I feel inside. Increasingly, I’ve felt disconnected from it, like it’s an ill-fitting pair of jeans you’ve outgro…

So here’s the thing, I’ve been pondering over something for awhile now and I thought, where better to turn for advice than to all you good folks here? So, I’ve kinda been wrestling with my own perception about my gender and sexuality. Feels a bit like putting together a jigsaw puzzle whilst not really knowing what the final picture is supposed to look like. You know what I mean? Like, for the longest time, I’d just gone along with the belief that I was straight and cisgender, cause that was what was expected. I mean, it’s kinda what we’re set up to believe, right? But lately, I’ve been questioning things. It’s kind of like when they revealed who Banksy is, and suddenl…

i’ve been wrestling with something for a while now and I feel like I just can’t get this out of my mind, you know? normally i’m a pretty private person but i think it’s time to voice out my thoughts. i’d really appreciate any input or advice, ’cause that’s what this place is about, right? not alone in the darkness of the internet, but united by our experiences and shared struggles. so, here it is. I think i’ve been questioning my gender identity and sexuality for some time. yeah, i know..it’s not a unique story or anything, and honestly, i’m not even sure what conclusion I have arrived at. grew up, like many of us, in an environment where there were clear-cut binaries…

hey all, kind of been losing sleep over this lately and I just, well, I thought maybe someone here would get it? I’m having a bit of a struggle with my sexuality and gender identity, I guess. You know those days when you just look at yourself in the mirror and wonder why can’t you just fit the mold? Yeah, it’s sort of like that for me, but most days. Some days I wake up feeling completely female, other days not so much and it’s so confusing I just feel like I’m not on a straight path. Like I’m always veering off, seeing everything in different colors. This sends me spiraling into a tizzy, scrolling through so many online articles about gender fluidity, non-binary ide…

Coming out can be such a mixed bag of emotions, right? I remember when I first came out, it felt like I was carrying this huge weight around, and once I said the words, it was like a massive sigh of relief. But then came the questions, the awkward pauses, and sometimes even the unwelcome advice. 🥲 I think what's important to remember is that everyone's journey is different and there's no right or wrong way to do it. Some people might feel comfortable coming out to everyone at once, while others might prefer to take it slow, one person at a time. And that's totally fine! What's been your experience like? Any tips or stories you'd like to share with others who might be in…

Hey there. So, I’ve been trying to come to terms with something that has been bothering me for a while. I guess it’s about my gender identity and sexual orientation. I’ve always identified as male, but something’s been nagging at me about that lately. You see, sometimes I find myself wishing I was born as a woman. I’m not really sure where these feelings are coming from, but they’re certainly there. And it’s not every day, more like hazy moments here and there. Like seeing myself in the mirror and thinking, ‘what if?’. Has anyone else ever felt this way? Now, about my sexuality. I’ve always been attracted to women, but now I find myself, well, noticing men more. …

Life’s an interesting journey, isn’t it? Growing up, I identified with the gender I was born with. But over time, especially in my twenties, I found myself asking questions. Did I feel a disconnect because I wasn’t ‘female’ enough? I found myself wondering about my pronouns. She/her didn’t feel quite right anymore. Of course, I reassured myself it’s okay not to fit perfectly into boxes, it’s okay to blur those lines. Isn’t language fascinating? The words we use, ‘he, she, they’ to determine who we are. How we see ourselves fits into these words, or, in some cases, doesn’t. For me, exploring the use of they/them was like flipping a switch. But remember, it might not b…

You know, I’ve been doing a heck of a lot of thinking recently. Anyone else the same? The topic of gender norms and sexuality are in my head allllll the time, probably thanks to all the buzz out there. It’s really making me question a lot of stuff. Firstly, I’ve been thinking about gender norms in our society, like who’s supposed to be masculine, who’s supposed to be feminine, and what that even means. I think it’s fair to say that, like me, a lot of you might’ve grown up in an environment where these roles were pretty rigid. Heck, my dad wouldn’t even let me play with Barbies ’cause I was a boy. How crazy is that? But in the last few years, and especially 2022, …

I remember when I first thought about coming out to my family. It felt like this huge mountain I had to climb, and I wasn't sure if I had the right gear. Has anyone else felt that way? I mean, it's one thing to know who you are and another thing entirely to share it with the people closest to you. For me, it was a mix of nerves and relief. I started by testing the waters with a close friend first, just to see how it felt to say it out loud. After that, I chose a time when my family was relaxed, which for us is usually after dinner when we're just chilling. I've heard of people writing letters, doing it over the phone, or even dropping hints until they felt ready to ha…

So, I was having a chat with a friend of mine from college - haven’t seen her in years. We got into this deep discussion about gender and sexuality, I’ve always considered myself pretty open-minded and well-informed, but I’ll be honest, I truly struggled a bit. She identified herself as gender fluid and I just realized I didn’t quite understand all the nuances. I get the basics - gender fluid, as I understand it, means you don’t fully identify as completely male or female, and might feel more one than another depending on the day. But then, how does that interact with your sexuality? If you’re gender fluid and attracted to women, as my friend is, does that make you st…