Support Forums

I am a Freshman in High School, and I need a bit of help. A friend of mine recently told me that she liked me, and I was surprised out of my mind due to her being much better than me (in looks and otherwise). She told me that I was too good for her and she liked me because I respect women. At first I thought she was lying just to play with my emotions. Another friend of mine told me that she has done something like that before with another man. So, I asked her and she said "I was serious." I still had my doubts, and they were stronger than ever. After asking for advice from a few friends, they told me to ask her out and I did (the first time ever asking anything of the sort to any woman). Her response was : "I don't know." I was ready to withstand denial, but for some reason, this crushed me. I asked her if she was kidding about the whole event again, and she said she said "I don't know," because she was too busy to have an intimate relationship. I still had a lingering sense of doubt, and thought she was lying and she was playing with me again. She wants to ask someone to Homecoming, but she hasn't asked him yet. I've tried to get it out of her, but she still hasn't said anything. So far, I've learned that I know him and he doesn't date very often (I fit both of those criteria). I also complimented her looks along the line of all of this ( called her "pretty"), and I felt terrible for it since I never judge people by looks. After saying sorry about this, I told her that she should find a man who likes her for more than looks. She said "I think I've found him." Now, I don't know who she's referring to at all. After all of this, I sank into a state of depression. I see all these people in relationships around me extremely happy, while I, on the other hand, are not. I want to get over all these feelings and frget about this, but I can't. Please help.

You're causing your own depression here, think of it this way, there's no real reason for you to be sad. You'll ruin your own opportunity by assuming too many things like this before you even find out if they are true or not. Everyone does that, they think of all the negatives first, and before too long after thinking of them too much it ruins their opportunity for something good because they always get down and depressed based on what they think (but can't prove).

My senses tell me that she is interested in you, but she can't tell you for some reason. Maybe she's afraid that you won't like her?

Do you realize that she could be thinking similar thoughts on the other end? That's one thing most people forget. She's human too, she will think of every reason to not try for something good for excuses she creates by herself because of doubt. Just because someone is beautiful doesn't mean that she doesn't have her bad times. Think about that as well.

Forget everything you're thinking about right now, and don't worry about it. You're sad for not getting an opportunity right away, when it's something you might have not had in the past. You should be happy that you could have the opportunity at something like this.

You don't know if she's starting to doubt whether you like her or not because of how much you've questioned her about her liking you. That's a possibility too. She said she liked you, now she says she doesn't no. She never said "No", so it doesn't mean she's not interested in you. If she didn't like you she would have told you no, trust me. If she said that though, she knows that it would get you away from her, which she might not want.

Hints:
-She said you know him, and that he doesn't date a lot. If that's you, then it's a hint that it probably is you. Girls will do that, they almost never tell you that it is you especially around your age group.

My outlook is that she's saying "I dont know" because you keep making her doubt the situation by questioning her. If I told a girl that I liked her, and she replied (exaggerating here) "Is this a joke?". Would that not deter you from her? Would you not think, "Oh... I guess she doesn't really like me".

Now you can apply this to the way she could possibly be feeling.

She said "I think I found him"

My suggestion is to not question the woman anymore. If you end up in a bad situation where she gets rid of you after a while, oh well. What was that? maybe 1-3 months of your lifetime? Or less?

Thank you.What's happened has put me into a state of depression since this never happened and I assumed a bit too much. I never thought about it that way, and I'll see what happens by following your advice.

---

Also: I assumed so many things since she can essentially get any man she wishes at the school, and that is why I was so bewildered by hearing her tell me that she liked me.

(09-12-2011, 07:18 PM)Guest Wrote: [ -> ]Thank you.What's happened has put me into a state of depression since this never happened and I assumed a bit too much. I never thought about it that way, and I'll see what happens by following your advice.

---

Also: I assumed so many things since she can essentially get any man she wishes at the school, and that is why I was so bewildered by hearing her tell me that she liked me.

Have you ever seen a show called Beauty and the geek? or Beauty and the beast? Looks don't matter. Some people look for different things in a guy. It's not always "Hottest girl goes with school jock" kind of logic.

Important skill for everyone to learn, don't assume before you know. It can destroy and corrupt you like *snap* that

Thank you for all of your advice. I feel much better about the entire situation now.

---

I haven't, by the way, but I'll be sure to see it. I just hope that she does feel the same way, if not, then I can move on .

She was lying...She's with another guy, and I believe I knew him from middle school, and I think he's a sophomore. I feel like a fool, but then again, who can blame her? She can do so much better than me...

She sounds like a real b*tch, but then again, so is karma, so don't worry about it, who cares? Plenty of other girls out there.

This has never happened before, and I doubt it will again. I should've known better to get my hopes up...

I think she is lying.
Don't worry.!

(09-15-2011, 10:14 AM)-Revolution- Wrote: [ -> ]I think she is lying.
Don't worry.!

I think you didn't even bother reading the thread, he mentioned whether she was being honest or just trying to play with his emotions.