Hi guys i want to ask you something... i am from india and it's not like US or any other country where sex is causal before marriage.
My last relationship (which lasted for about 4 months) got broken because i wanted to do it with my girl before marriage. She was thinking that i will going to dump him after sometime but i really love her so much i tried to tell her, i said sorry to her many times.. but
.... So is this wrong if you want to get some happiness from the person you love ?
No, it's not wrong. If you're an Indian, and so was she, you both (or just her) might have been under the impression that sex before marriage was wrong. In America, Australia, and most western places, casual sex is the norm'.
yeah i know buddy and i don't think it's wrong...it's just a normal human need..but she don't think that..:/
Why would it be wrong? Understand that no one can interpret and plan for how their emotions map out. If you love someone then how are you supposed to change that? Stronger feelings lead to different things, and how would before or after marriage make a difference when it's just a period in time in between the same feelings from when you loved her before marriage and probably still will love her after marriage?
Marriage doesn't mean anything, no matter what people tell you about how special it is, it doesn't change anything except force you into a deeper commitment on some levels, but your love for the person will still be there, and people decide to get married at different times... And some people don't even get married but they seem to do just fine.
hmmm.. i started feeling that it was my fault.. so i wanted to get your opinion on this...but i think i didn't have done wrong.. but don't know... maybe i have just bad luck.. :/
You definitely can't change her opinion on the subject, unless you happened to open her eyes to the reality of what marriage really means in relationship to the word love. It really doesn't mean anything in my opinion. What does it give you that you don't already have before you get married? (Other than a couple rings and the actual ceremony that puts you thousands in dept.)
It's in your nature due to hormones to want to engage in sex. She may even want to engage with you but it goes against the culture. If you pressured her what you did was wrong and you should apologize and tell her that you will wait with her.
You may think you love her now. But in reality you might not always be with her, she stood strong with her morals. Most people that have sex when there young, break up and then when you get married its not as special. Sex in her eyes is very important and she is waiting till she gets married for it.
There is nothing wrong with what you did but if she said no, you should respect her desires and wants. Sex isn't everything in a relationship, and sex for a girl is alot different then for a guy.
I wouldn't say you were wrong as I don't believe you forced it on her and you let her do her own thing with it. You were simply expressing the way you feel about her, but I do agree with Christy with what they say.
If you had forced her however then yes I would say you were in the wrong =/
Seeing as the culture between US and India is very different, I completely understand what your girlfriend was thinking, but I also agree that you were not wrong since it is something very casual and common in the USA.