I know a lot of people are going to tell me that it'll come with time and that this kind of stuff shouldn't be a rush and believe me, I know that. But when one by one, all of your close friends are finally getting laid for the first time, it feels like I'm standing still. I'm 18 years old and I've had girlfriends in the past but I sort of hit this dry season. For chrissake, kids are starting to have sex at 14 years old nowadays and I've never even made-out with a girl. The most I've done is cuddle and kiss. But I'm not a nerd. I have plenty of friends, I'm really funny and make a lot of people laugh IRL but I'm just getting worried that its taking so long. I don't want to hit that point of desperation where I say to myself "Well, if it hasn't happened yet, why try anymore", which is unfortunately what some men result to.
Does anyone have some reassuring advice? Preferably from someone that is or was in my situation, give or take a couple years difference.
Seriously, what's the rush with loosing your virginity?
Well their must be more to it, if your 18 and you have had girlfriends some of them had to have tried to makeout at least.
(12-08-2010, 02:37 PM)Zeon Wrote: [ -> ]Seriously, what's the rush with loosing your virginity?
Truthfully it's better to have had sex a couple of times before you find that very special girl or things will seem very awkward, but I would understand if he is from one of those family's that wait until marriage.
Think of it this way, you can focus on college and not have children when you do not want to.
Virginity isn't a bad thing, and I get so sick of people posting around saying OH I wish I lost mine, or whatever. AT least you know you didn't knock up some girl. Or get an std. Or both. You're in a safe world right now.
Who cares man? im suprised but never making out with a girl but hey thats just how things go, itlll happen just try but dont get desperate then you'll get a whore and get an std or something
(12-08-2010, 02:37 PM)iCyber Attack Wrote: [ -> ]Well their must be more to it, if your 18 and you have had girlfriends some of them had to have tried to make-out at least.
I've had three girlfriends but most of them were throughout high school and I'm not ashamed to say that at that age, we kids didn't know what the heck we were doing, or at least I didn't.
With all three of those girlfriends, all I used to do was give them a peck (for those that are unfamiliar with that term, it's just a small kiss on the lips) when we'd meet up or have to leave for class or go home. I'd been to watch movies with all three of them and kissed them all but I don't really know if the following constitutes having 'made-out'. For instance, with my last girlfriend, which by the way was still a couple of years ago, we went to watch a movie and I kissed her repeatedly without pausing but it didn't feel like I was making-out in all honesty. It was like I'd kiss her, slightly back off and then repeat for a couple of seconds.
I've never really made-out, to my standard of 'making-out'. But I don't think that's the root of the problem here. Frankly, I'm not sure
what is.
My parents are not strict in any way; for whomever suggested they'd only want me to be in a relationship after marriage, that's not it. Both my older sisters; 22 and 20, are in long-term relationships even though my parents are separated.
And whoever said something about not rushing to lose my virginity, I'm not. In fact, my friends all ask me how I can be so patient. But when all of my close friends are losing their virginities one after another, not to mention friends that I would have never thought would lose it before me, it's only normal that I'm growing a little concerned.
There is nothing you should be concerned about, if you have sex now that's great and if you have to wait a little longer that's also fine. The main point is like you said, not becoming scared to the point where you won't ever be able to make it to that step.
My suggestion would be to get a new girlfriend & talk to her for a while, text her and call her on the phone. And btw texting a girl is a lot easier when talking about sexual things, after a while it will just happen and when it does make sure you wrap it just incase. If you use a latex there is only a .01% chance so im pretty sure your not going to fudge up if your smart.
Good luck & hope I helped a little.
(12-08-2010, 04:20 PM)iCyber Attack Wrote: [ -> ]My suggestion would be to get a new girlfriend & talk to her
Right there. If I'd be able to
just do that, I wouldn't be in this situation, or as steep as I am now.
I spoke to my close friend and explained him that I'm still a kid at heart. While some guys would much rather win a girl's heart over by being masculine and physically appealing, I hope for the best with my humor. I can make most of my friends laugh at times. But the reason I brought it up with him is because I'm under the impression that the 'funny card' doesn't work once you reach my age. My friend told me I'm wrong and it still does. He's very experienced with women so I have to ask;
Who's right?
(12-08-2010, 04:26 PM)Hello my name is: Wrote: [ -> ]Right there. If I'd be able to just do that, I wouldn't be in this situation, or as steep as I am now.
I spoke to my close friend and explained him that I'm still a kid at heart. While some guys would much rather win a girl's heart over by being masculine and physically appealing, I hope for the best with my humor. I can make most of my friends laugh at times. But the reason I brought it up with him is because I'm under the impression that the 'funny card' doesn't work once you reach my age. My friends told me I'm wrong and it still does.
Who's right?
You are both right, it just depends on the girl. Go on facebook or myspace and try messaging some girls from High School that you think you may have a shot with.